Steve Lowery

Carolina update: Panthers owner Jerry Richardson recently put the team up for sale after multiple stories came to light of his racist behavior and sexual misconduct. This included directing a racial epithet at an African-American scout—go ahead, guess which one—while also demanding that employees refer to him as ‘Mister,” which in no way is a […]

Cleveland update: Along with Syria and wherever Melania Trump goes to reflect honestly about her life choices, Cleveland is one of the saddest spots on Earth. It’s a sadness so profound that it can take bona-fide awesome things and turn them into awfulness—you know, like what Facebook did to the internet. Cleveland’s once-great-and-proud NFL franchise […]

New England update: Most people think Boston when they think of the Patriots, but the team actually represents all of New England, a region of majestic beauty and soaring passive-aggressiveness. It’s also famous for its political independence, as it’s home to senators Bernie Sanders and Sue Collins, the latter a Republican whose no vote helped […]

Washington update: Washington’s offensive line has struggled this season, ranking in the top 10 for allowing quarterback sacks (31). The team’s other offensive line, its nickname, is No. 1 when it comes to being virulently hateful and awful. Some have argued that this somehow makes the nickname racist, seizing on the weak argument that it […]

Tennessee update: Articles of impeachment were recently introduced against Donald Trump by Tennessee Congressman Steve Cohen, jolting Americans who were shocked to learn there are Cohens in Tennessee. (Who knew?) The reasons for impeachment are legion and sound—take, for instance, the day before the articles were announced, a day that featured the Attorney General of […]

Los Angeles update: The Rams have been a big surprise this year, kind of how it was a big surprise that Roy Moore, Republican senatorial candidate in Alabama, had been accused of sexual misconduct with a 14-year-old girl. Well, a big surprise until two facts came to light, i.e., “Roy Moore” and “Alabama.” Colleagues said […]

Los Angeles update: At 58, the Chargers are the middle-aged dude who leaves his wife/longtime girlfriend after misreading a bit of attention for want of a commitment. Chargers: I’m here! I left San Diego! Los Angeles: Wait. What? All I said was you look good in powder blue. Uh, I’ve aIready got something going on […]

Indianapolis Update: The Colts are Indiana’s team, just as Mike Pence was its governor before he and Russian Funboy Donald Trump were swept into office by getting 2,864,974 less votes than their opponents. Pence’s main value is as an Impeachment Cooler since his extreme views—he opposed federal funding for treating people with HIV and AIDS […]

No Cal State Fullerton professor in recent memory ever needed a summer vacation more than Alain Bourget. Bourget is the math professor whose refusal to use the required textbook for his Math 250B course, "Introduction to Linear Algebra and Differential Equations," to instead teach from one about $100 cheaper created headlines across the nation. He […]

And you drive. Out of Huntington Beach, out of OC, out to where stands the original In-N-Out and its company store, which sells In-N-Out-related T-shirts and hoodies, and maybe you smile to yourself because where you’re headed, you’re not gonna need any of that. Then again, maybe you don’t smile because, you know, Baldwin Park. […]

Steve Lowery wrote the column Diary of a Mad County from 2003 to 2007. He is also the only person in the world louder than Gustavo Arellano. Babies, originally I was going to tell you about what I've been doing since I left the Weekly nearly 10 years ago, but there's really not much to […]