La Habra freak show Nadya “Octomom” Suleman closed out 2009 as the nation's least desirable neighbor. Now, that's impressive. I spent the past decade blasting music and screaming to friends–we thought we were talking–at all hours of the night and what did I get? Nothing. No award. No mention of my obnoxiousness in any news outlets–except the ones I wrote for. Just the occasional visit from the friendly Florida policeman reminding my cohorts and I that the old ladies down the street were trying to sleep and, please, keep it the fuck down. Octomom, here's to you, the least talented person in the history of humankind to routinely make headlines.
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