Wednesday's Headlines N Surprises: Another Carona Monster?

  • Did Carona Create Yet Another Monster? If I was indicted Sheriff Michael S. Carona, I might be getting tired of Jo Ann Galisky, Kool-Aid Queen. This acting sheriff bit has swelled her mullet. Six weeks after she became temporary head honcho, she's still telling everyone she can that Carona's absence “has had no impact” at the Orange County Sheriff's Department. Galisky (pictured busy at work) barked the line again yesterday, according to Peggy Lowe at the Register. Galisky's wrong again. At a minimum, dozens of married, slightly overweight, emotionally-needy, low-level female department employees are safe from sexual harassment at work. Lowe also reports that county counsel told the board of supervisors that they are powerless to alter Carona's self-imposed paid-leave absence. Board Chairman Chris Norby then declared Carona “still sheriff in every sense of the word,” which is a funny thought given that our indicted top lawman is spending his days trying to get folks to participate in his coverup hopes. Oh, sure. I'm kidding. Mikey wouldn't do that himself. Cowards always get slap-happy morons to do their dirty work.
  • I've done something terrible: Jeffrey Ray Nielsen–the Orange County Republican activist pedophile and ex-Dana Rohrabacher aide–finally admitted he's guilty of pleasuring himself sexually with a 12-year-old Virginia boy and a Westminster high school freshman boy. You've read the pathetic tales here. But some folks at the Register are disturbed by my Nielsen coverage. In my most recent story a week ago, I noted that the Reg had celebrated Nielsen as a compassionate hero allegedly saving homeless kittens from the Katrina disaster WITHOUT EVER MENTIONING THAT HE WAS AT THE TIME AN ACCUSED PEDOPHILE. “Nowhere did [our story] mention kittens,” read an email from a staffer. Yep, it was homeless puppies the paper claimed Nielsen was aiding WITHOUT EVER MENTIONING THAT HE WAS AT THE TIME AN ACCUSED PEDOPHILE. I apologize for my error.
    [Editor's note: Actually, our story did say puppies, not kittens. So we're right, and they're wrong. Again.]
  • Christian Broadcasting Network Finds OC “War”: Pat Robertson's CBN folks went looking for villains and found–oh, Jesus, no–“homosexuals” once again. Of course, it's not good enough that the Sodomites want equal protection under the law. According to CBN, they've cleverly infiltrated schools as teachers and want to wear dresses to work. If a student voices opposition to the garments, they'll be sued by the homosexual teacher, according to Jose Gonzales, “a concerned Orange County resident.” Gonzales told CBN, “We're in the middle of a big culture war and what's at stake right now is the traditional family.” Jose, please let me know when the first lawsuit is filed.
  • — R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

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