Get Your Rocks Off

As a frequenter of the AMC 30 at the Block every Thursday night when they show all the new releases, I've also become a fan of Cafe Tu Tu Tango, the most adjacent restaurant, and bar that seems to stay open the latest.

It was only last week, however, that I realized they don't serve my usual beverage. Not exactly.

Double-Jack and Diet is my drink, and before I proceed I imagine I need to justify the “Diet” part. Two things:

1. In high school, my dentist told me it was better for my teeth to drink Diet Coke, so I did.
2. After college, I got a job at a movie theater, which included unlimited free popcorn and sodas. I determined that if I was going to drink soda all day, it would be better for me if it were the no-calorie kind. Like any beverage you drink all the time, I grew to like the taste of it, and now I prefer the chemical flavor to that of high-fructose corn syrup.

Also, The Rock drinks Jack and Diet. After I read that in Rolling Stone I no longer felt any embarrassment about it all.


Anyway, the bartender at Cafe Tu Tu Tango said he couldn't serve me a double. “Liability issues,” he explained, though he can make a mixed drink with the same amount of alcohol, so it sounds like his bosses are into feel-good semantics. But he did promise he'd make my single good and strong. Which he did.

Then, when it came time to order a second, he told me the secret, which might just be the most useful thing you'll read all week: Ask for a “rocks pour.”

[forgive me if this is common-knowledge for all the hardcore Bukowski types out there — it's news to the rest of us]

See, if you order a Jack on the rocks, you get more liquor than if you order a Jack-and-Diet. But ask for the latter with a “rocks pour,” and you get the full effect. It costs like a buck more, but so worth it.

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