“Yo, Wayne, I need a dope rhyme for 'fellatio.' Help a brotha out.”
The satirical story about prolific Southern rapper Lil Wayne collaborating with High School Musical star Zac Efron has inspired one sensitive soul to pen this heartfelt piece of fanfiction on his blog.
All that's left now is for Weezie and Zac to do the very damn thing writer Ben Westhoff conjured in his fevered imagination. Can you say “multi-platinum sales”?
Now here's that scintillating exchange:
Zac: Oh my God, did you read that article? That's… I mean, that's crazy, right?
Weezie: Yo man, don't sweat that ish, them muvfvkkers don't know shee-it bout how we do. You my new brother from another mother, naw mean? That's blood son, that's love, my true brother.
Zac (steps close): Really? That's awesome, and so deep. Vanessa never gets that deep with me.
Weezie: That's cause Nessa Baby ain't your man, baby. She ain't your brother. She can't hold you like I can.
Zac (steps closer): Hold me?
Weezie (bounces): Yeah son, when the chips are down you got to hold this nigga, and I got to hold you, cause you my brother now, that's blood, that's life!
Zac (steps close): So like, you know, whatever, right? If I was all, “whassup my nigga!” and then stepped up to you like now, then-
Weezie: Tha black is hott, the black is hott
Zac: Bet on It! Umm, that's… that's one of my songs. The song I sing. “Not gonna stop till I get-” ahem, my shot. Am I standing too close to you?
Weezie: Boy you could stand in me and it wouldn't be close enough! Cause we blood now, the blood is in our veins and in our soul, BIG WEEZIE!
Zac: Yeah… totally, yeah.
