“Merry Christmas, Motherfuckers!”: Seven Favorite Hip-Hop Holiday Songs

While it doesn't happen too much anymore these days, the hip-hop world has been known to put out a holiday album or two–and sometimes the  too-bright cheerfulness of Christmas carols pairs up extra nicely with the often humorous and/or the sometimes, uh, adult content of the lyrics.

After the jump: Our favorite seven hip-hop holiday songs… with an extra special bonus honorable mention that involves Paul McCartney and Dr. Dre.


7. Run DMC: “Christmas in Hollis”

Was this one too obvious? Too bad–that doesn't take away from how this is one of our fave Christmas tracks ever (take that, Trans-Siberian Orchestra!). Note the creative usage of the “Simon” game in the intro skit.

And what about the cutest closing lines ever, as DMC unwraps a present with a brand new gold rope chain: “My name's DMC with the mic in my hand/And I'm chilling and coolin just like a snowman/So open your eyes, lend us an ear/Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!”

P.S. What's Santa doing with cold hundreds of Gs?

6. Beat Street: “Santa's Christmas Rap”

Starring Doug E. Fresh and the Treacherous Three, Beat Street paid homage to the early '80s East Coast hip-hop scene: B-boys, graffiti artists, DJs… you know. This track is from a Christmas skit put on by the Magnificent Force, Treacherous Three and Doug E. Fresh in the film.

5. Kurtis Blow: “Christmas Rapping”

These. Are. the Breaks! Kurtis Blow was only 20-years-old when “Christmas Rapping” (wrapping… rapping. Get it?) was released.

The more you know: Does that guitar riff sound familiar? '90s R&B group Next sampled it in their tune “Too Close.”

4. Spyder-D: “Ghetto Santa Christmas Rap”

While Spyder-D might not have the same en masse name recognition as his contemporaries Russell Simmons, Run DMC and LL Cool J, Spyder-D remains much respected in the hip-hop industry. In this track, Spyder-D raps as a “ghetto Santa Claus,” promising to bring G.I. Joes and Thundercats to his fans. And Gucci sweaters. [

3. RZA and Craig Ferguson: “Deck the Halls”

Really, we just like all the noises Wu-Tang's RZA and late night talk show host Craig Ferguson are making at each other in this one.

2. Snoop Dogg, Nate Dogg, Daz Dillenger, Bad Azz, Tray Dee: “Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto”

Embedding is disabled on this one, but really, who even knew Death Row put out a holiday record?

The track title and chorus (crooned by the unmistakable Nate Dogg) pays homage to another favorite Christmas song, James Brown's “Santa Claus, Go Straight to the Ghetto.”

Click here to listen to the track. All I want for Christmas is my six-four Chevrolet.

1. Eazy-E: “Merry Muthafuckin' X-mas”

Eazy-E kicks this one off with gunfire and a “Merry Christmas, motherfuckers!” Other choice lines from this one include “Nuts on her chin ring” and “Oh what fun it is to nut, while she's suckin' on my dick.” 

Honorable Mention–Paul McCartney vs. Dr. Dre: “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time the Next Episode”

This is either the worst or greatest thing we've ever heard–that being said, it's also made Wings' “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time” actually kinda tolerable.

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