I'm So Sorry to Hear About Your Penis

You were the driver of the big crane on the freeway early in the morning who forced numerous cars to swerve out of your way when you made a lane change without signalling or giving a shit about other drivers. Your freaking tire is bigger than my vehicle, but maybe you like to push others around with your big rig because you have a small penis. As you drove down the road, I noticed you slouching in the seat like a typical cholo with his foot on the dash and his finger in his nose. I’m sure that, sooner or later, someone with your diminished ability will end up injuring someone because of your lack of common sense. Jerk.

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations—changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to “Hey, You!” c/o OC Weekly, 2975 Red Hill Ave., Ste. 150, Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or e-mail us at le*****@oc******.com.


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