When we were talked into attending the Winter Fancy Food Fest in the Bay Area, we anticipated some hoity-toity finds. What we didn't count on was eccentric bites reminiscent of those Truly Tasteless Jokes books. Don't get us wrong– they're all legit products. We just think creative fell more than thought outside of the box.
Here's what caught our attention and made us go WTF. Remember: Cray cray is in the eye of the beholder.
5. Fartless Factory
The class equivalent of a whoopee cushion, these products were created out of necessity. Their story, as told by The Old Fart, stems from an annual pheasant hunt attended by friends. Homemade chili (with beans grown on the farm) caused a stir for many who consumed. As a result, they concocted pinto beans that worked so well, Fartless debuted in the mid-80s. Obviously going strong, their line extends to candy logs, salsa and even beer bread. Kudos for calling it like they see it. #nofilter
4. Wasabi Sauce
We can't place our finger on exactly why this annoys us so much. Could it remind us of the novice sushi eater's ignorance on using wasabi sparingly? Perhaps it's the notion that more often than not, your average eater is like a heat-seeking missile, and will go cray cray over a new spicy, green sauce. Nah, it's the possibility that wasabi sauce will bring back the "Wassup/Wassabi!" tagline, and urge us to bitch slap the next person to utter it. Oh, Kikkoman— stick to low-sodium soy sauce.
3. Psy for Nongshim instant noodles
2. Rub Some Butt BBQ Sauce
Oh, those Carolina BBQers! Gotta love 'em for a catchy name. Rub Some Butt reminds us of the time we were in Ville Platte, Louisana, and stumbled upon the Slap Ya Mama! general store. They were present at the fest, too. We chuckled, smiled, took our pic and walked away. If there was a Spencer's for food products, this would be a best-seller. Right next to our #1. . .
1. Holy Crap cereal
A contributing writer for OC Weekly, Anne Marie freelances for multiple online and print publications, and guest judges for culinary competitions. A Bay Area transplant, she graduated with a degree in Hospitality Management from Cal Poly Pomona. Find her on Instagram as brekkiefan.