Though we have two very fine food reviewers here at OC Weekly, they — like most food critics — tend not to dwell at any length on the cuisine I'm most familiar with. Namely, mass corporate-chain produced fast food items. So I feel that perhaps it is my duty to periodically spread the joy that will spread your waistline.
The other night at Dave and Buster's, for instance, I discovered a fantastic item that deserves your full attention (or not, if you're on a diet). Here in the U.S., we're great at combining unhealthy items to create even more unhealthy hybrids — witness the bacon cheeseburger pizza, the chili cheese fry, and of course the jalapeño popper (what's better than a fried, breaded pepper? One stuffed with cheese and dipped in buttermilk dressing, of course).
So I have to wonder why it took the world so long to come up with the Philly Steak Roll — a cheese-steak wrapped in an egg roll and deep fried. Oh, it gets better. Not only do you get a crispy fried egg roll containing thin slices of beef in a reservoir of liquid cheese…it also comes with cheese sauce for dipping! That, and “spicy ketchup” (ketchup with some horseradish, so basically cocktail sauce by another name), which is negligible.
One of these appetizers gets you two full rolls, each cut in half. If you can handle the whole thing yourself, and you probably shouldn't, don't bother ordering a main course. If you feel like you can handle one afterwards, you are freakin' fat and should diet now. Go burn some calories on the virtual jump-rope game in the D&B arcade.
D&B's website doesn't give specific prices, probably because they vary city to city. But at The Block, I believe the rolls were around 8.95.