If you're hankering for a little distance from Irvine, which annoyingly mentions their "No. 1 safest city" rating every time something weird happens, then head on over to the Glass House to see Horse the Band and Criteria. There's nothing like a night of Nintendo-core and post-punk to ease your middle-class woes.
Horse the Band's eardrum assault is more aggressive than I like my Tuesday nights, but the group's eight-bit-inspired hardcore is the best compromise for you and your triforce-obsessed significant other. Their synth-powered sound is best heard in "Soaring Quails," an instrumental track that's part hair-metal guitar solo, part overworld-theme gone haywire. Other songs mention obscure two-dimensional nemeses to test your video-game IQ.
And if that isn't quite your style, make sure to get there in time to catch Criteria's smart lyrics and angular guitar riffs. Your boyfriend gets Nintendo-core, you get indie-rock and maybe a Pols voice button, and everyone goes home happy. At any rate, no one does art-colony-crazy better than the Glass House.
Horse the Band with Criteria, Poison the Well, Fall of Troy and more at the Glass House, 200 W. Second St., Pomona; www.theglasshouse.us. Tues., 7 p.m. $12. All ages.
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