The Orange County Interwebs Horror (Road) Show

This week's horrific show–which is composed to things said about and/or from Orange County on the Interwebs–takes a road trip. After the jump, you'll be treated to a freeway trickster, an Ultimate Fighter outta gas, a family that lives out of an RV (on purpose) and a surfing skier (and the readers who hate him).

America's Funniest Home Car Pool Lane Videos The poster was on the 5 freeway in Orange County when the motorcycle driver to his/her left “decided to put on a little show for the rest of us driving along.” One hopes the cyclist has insurance. (

Fair Weather Friend “I just can't make up my mind,” Kouros
tells readers, “if I should throw my surf board in the Roadster and hit
the beach . . . say Laguna Beach, Newport Beach, Dana Point or
Huntington? Or, do you think it's better to grab the skis and go to the
snow-packed slopes only one hour away? It's so hard to decide.” Kouros
gets no sympathy for his dilemma from those shivering in other parts of
the country. Jim: “I say you hop on a plane and help me shovel the foot
of snow out of my driveway.” Matt: “BEACH, BEACH, BEACH. It's 30 degrees
cold slushy snow here in Cincinnati, Ohio, area. Wish I had some nice
warm sun!” Darren: “That is just one of the meanest posts I've ever
read!” Mark: “I ran out of propane yesterday and got back from Cleveland
last night to find the house at a balmy 53 degrees. With the snow
falling, the propane truck couldn't make it up my drive. Slept with the
electric heater on in the bedroom until the driveway was plowed and the
propane arrived at 10 this morning. The only upside was my dilemma: Do I
bundle up in extra layers, or sleep naked and let the girlfriend keep me
warm? Turns out I made a great decision!” Kouros' retort: “C'mon, Mark!
I'm just getting my real-estate money's worth here. Don't worry. It
won't be long before we get bashed again.” Hey, anyone else just feel
the earth move? (ffcars)

Illustration by Jay Brockman

Gas Pains Tito “The Bad Boy of Huntington Beach” Ortiz is one Ultimate Fighting Championship bout away from learning if he's out of gas when it comes to competing again in the UFC octagon. But, as a cameraman discovered, Mr. Jenna Jameson's Maserati already ran out of gas while the grappler was driving around Orange County. A passerby who recognized Ortiz loaned him a gas can and drove him to a filling station for relief. Providing the opposite of relief are some of those who left comments on Mitch Michaels' 411mania posting.

Jared B.: “Hey, it's like when he fought Frank Shamrock! There, now nobody can make that joke.”

Jay Maleezy: “Symbolic of his career.”

Duh: “Deja vu when he fought Frank Sha . . .
. . . Oh.”

Phudjie: “You'd think there would be a fuel gauge on an expensive car like that.”

Joe Daddy: “Just like the time he fought Frank Sha . . . damn it! Just for the record, Tito is and always will be an unbelievable douche.”

420: “I think Tito did it on purpose so sites like 411mania would talk about him for another day.” (411mania)

The Whole World By a String Photographer Tara Whitney met up with the Thiede family, who reside in an RV traveling around the U.S., at Doheny State Beach in Dana Point. Hopefully, that RV gets television reception so two of its inhabitants could understand the photographer's stage direction. “In the mom/daughter walking down the beach shots,” Whitney explains, “I told them to pretend they were in a tampon commercial–that's how I get the big laughs.” (

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