Special Year-End ¡Ask a Mexican! Edition!

DEAR READERS: Since it's the end of the year and the Mexican is on his 18th tamale (made by the mujeres in his family, of course), behold some letters from angry readers (and one fan), along with my answers. Enjoy your champurrado, gracias for a great 2013, and may your 2014 involve more cousins smuggled into los Estados Unidos than ever before!

 

DEAR PHONY MEXICAN: I read and enjoy your column on a regular basis. More often than not, I respect your perspective on issues as they are presented to you. However, your response to CARROS two weeks ago was disingenuous. You referenced [Federal Highway Administration] statistics as justification for what I believe is passive-aggressive behavior. I divide my time between Denver and Puerto Vallarta. What CARROS was describing is spot-on.

In Denver, “most” of the pedestrians cross intersections with the intent to reach the other side with the exception of the younger Mexicans. They seem to make this into an “I dare you” or “FU” experience. “Hmmm . . . you want to turn? Well, maybe I/we will eventually get out of the way, sooner or later, after I'm done being 'way cool.'” So, with all due respect, while your FHA statistics are disturbing, I can't help but think that this may in fact be a chicken or the egg issue (passive aggressive).

If you want, we can do this in Spanish.

Peyton's Pendejo

QUERIDO GABACHO: Los cholos no son mexicanos.

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DEAR MEXICAN: Regarding your reply to the guy “not wearing bean-colored glasses”: It is all about which families put an emphasis on education, not getting pregnant, and achievement. Lots of Asian immigrant families do, and their kids succeed and move up the economic ladder quickly. Lots of Hispanic families do not, so they more often see generational poverty. There are, of course, exceptions on both sides. But focusing on the exceptions does nothing to solve the problem. I don't suspect you'll like hearing that. And that is why politicians don't say it, and that is why nothing changes.

Model Minority Man

DEAR CARROS: And, again, class almost always determines which families push their children to better their station. Can you explain generational poverty among gabachos in the South? Of course you can't, so why beholdest thou the mote that is in Mexicans' eyes, but considerest not the beam that is in thine gabacho's own eye?

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DEAR MEXICAN: I've been reading your column for the past year and a half, and sometimes I can't help but laugh at the things you say. As a fellow Mexican, I've been thinking a lot about the racism that's thrown my way every day. I live in Kansas, and its full of racist people, but I just wanted to hear your thoughts on this subject, and maybe you can throw a laugh in there. Hope to see this in the paper!

Saul From Salina

DEAR WAB: Mexicans and Kansas and funny? Your Secretary of State, Kris Kolbach, is a pinche pendejo baboso. And boxer Brandon Rios is a punching bag.

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DEAR MEXICAN: Your statement that the beans assimilate as the previous immigrants in the past? You got to have your head up your ass so far that you don't know which way daylight is located. The beaners aren't educated, they can't speak English, they remain on the bottom of the graduation rate in the country. No surprise: look at the shit hole country where they came from—same stats.

Richard the Randy Racist

DEAR GABACHO: I have a hard time taking seriously a man who goes on and on about education—but wrote on the subject line for his email “assimulate.”

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