Pablo Francisco: He's Coming to Orange County and He's Putting It Out There

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OC Weekly (Ali Lerman): When did you realize you could make so many noises and do all of the impersonations? 
Pablo Francisco: Well, I had these neighbors that would ask me to come over and make fun of their cousins and stuff, so that is pretty much how it happened. 
Did it bother your parents once you started doing it all of the time?
Absolutely! I used to come home and do it, and my dad would say, “Are you drunk?” I'd say, “Yeah, most of the time.” Then I started doing comedy and, after the money started rolling in, now it's a beautiful thing. 
So what's your favorite impression to do?
Right now I would say Michael J. Fox. “Come on, I can't believe it. Yeah Doc, you wanna play some Jenga?” (Movie trailer voice). Next time on celebrity rehab…Michael J. Fox. 
Is there celebrity rehab for Parkinson's? 
Haha. Look, we all love him. I'm just saying he puts it out there. You know he directed The Blair Witch Project? I bet he can make a mean drink. 
Haha. I'm with you! Speaking of putting it out there…isn't that the name of your next album?
Yeah, it's called We Put it Out There. We're going to make fun of porno stars, the Shamwow guy and lot of other good stuff. It was supposed to come out last month in Ontario, but someone pirated it and put some segments of it on YouTube. Now we're in the process of rewriting parts of it. It was both good and bad, because we had to change a few things anyway because of sponsors. 
Will there be any surprises at the New Year's Eve show? 
We're going to try to make it a little different. We're going to have a black guy, so there'll be a white portion of the show and a black portion. We'll actually have about six different acts. It's going to be lovely there at the Irvine Improv, and we're going to poke a little fun at the people of Irvine. Then we're going to go to Oakley and return all of our clothes. 
What's the material going to be like? I know people look forward to specific acts that you do.
It's going to be some old stuff and some new stuff, so it's a show you are really going to want to go to. Do yourself a favor and go to the first show, then go out to a techno club.
When people meet you do they always try to impersonate you doing one of your acts?
Oh yeah! I love it–it's a beautiful thing. I don't even care if people ask me to do the same thing over and over. I don't care! I love doing the same thing. I'll never ever complain. 
My favorite is when you do Ricky Martin. “Queer I am…alone again.”
Let me tell you, am I jealous of Ricky? No. Yes I am. Well kind of, yeah! He's on the cover of magazines, “I'm gay! I'm gay!” Good for you man…haha…”Queer I am.” I forgot all about that. 
It's like you're psychic. So who'll be your next victim?
Right now, I'm into the R&B/hip-hop lazy kind of guy. You know like, “Whassup man? Yeah, whassup. I clean it up like proactiv. I take a crack rock and turn it into a mountain.” They're boasting about stupid stuff. Another thing I'm doing is about guys on Craigslist, Facebook and all of that. These guys are liars and pieces of crap. So basically I'm joining the women's side on that. The guys actually think they can outsmart the woman when it comes to lying and cheating on these websites. I can't believe how many of my friends are turning into these guys! I'm pro-woman on that issue!
I can appreciate that, and I have a suggestion if you're looking for someone else to rag on…
You know what? Right now, give me a suggestion. 
Justin Bieber. You know, something about the baby hair “down there” doing the comb-over like his hair.
Ohhh, can I use that?? Let me have that one! There must be another way to market this kid. You've got Usher talking about sex. “Sex, awww yeah, baby. Sex, sex me.” And then you have Bieber. “Yeah baby, you wanna touch my bum-bum?” Do think woman want to bang this kid? It's kind of creepy in a child molestation kind of way.
Yeah I do. I think he uses the pick-up line, “My initials are J.B. and backwards, that's B.J.”
Ohhh–I'm taking that, too! Can I have that one? See, this is great. We're bouncing material off of each other. That little Bieber is shaving himself backwards. He's not saying, “What's your macaroni and cheese taste like?” 

It's clear that we are both sick and out of touch with today's youth, and you've got a birthday coming up. Are you feeling your age?
I'm about to be 43, and I am loving every minute of it. I could still kick some young guy's ass in a bar, so I'm feeling pretty good. I'll be hanging out thinking of better and funnier ways to showcase these punk-ass punks on MySpace. 
No way, 43? Seriously…you are looking pretty young. 
Well, thank you very much. You know what it is? It's face protector from The Body Shop. 
Oh my god…you ARE Ricky Martin!
Yeah, but Ricky Martin looks legit. I look like money poon from far away. 
You can see more of Pablo Francisco on his website, and pick up one of his hysterical comedy DVD's. Also, get your tickets now to see Pablo at the Irvine Improv December 30th-January 2nd. For tickets call 949-854-5455 or log onto: www.improv.com The Improv is located at 71 Fortune Drive #841 Irvine, CA 92618 (21+ over)

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