10) “Stump the Band” now brought to you by Cialis.
9) Green room double padlocked when Hollywood starlets are inside.
8) While promoting the new season of The Girls Next Door, a creepy old man who bangs much younger women will be in one chair and Hugh Hefner will be in the other.
7) G Love and Special Sauce no longer just a musical guest.
6) Special audience seating for grand jury members.
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5) By the time the clip for the latest lame romantic comedy is finished playing, Kate Hudson and Dave will have married.
4) George Clooney begging to be on weekly for dating tips.
3) Dave doing monologue wearing only a bathrobe.
2) Production company's new name is Worldwide Pants Down.
. . . And the number one change to The Late Show in light of the David Letterman scandal:
1) Female interns must sign pre-nups.
OC Weekly Editor-in-Chief Matt Coker has been engaging, enraging and entertaining readers of newspapers, magazines and websites for decades. He spent the first 13 years of his career in journalism at daily newspapers before “graduating” to OC Weekly in 1995 as the alternative newsweekly’s first calendar editor.