Twenty years ago this holiday season, the Reverend Slappy White fell off a turnip truck he'd hitched a ride on in Riverside. Instead of Stanton, he came to downtown Fullerton, where he immediately fell in with a ragtag collection of actors, poets, musicians, artists, and other assorted sauciers and drug addicts.
His first contribution to the city's lone non-college theater troupe at the time—Revolving Door Productions, housed in the Tribune Theater, which is now a cigar lounge—helped it earn laurels from the Los Angeles Times as Newt Gingrich's worst nightmare: The A Dolt's Only Xma$ Pageant. While the Tribune Theater only lasted a couple of years, that profane, irreverent, juvenile, raunchy and stupid-as-fuck Christmas show is still around, now in its 20th year (give or take a couple when the good Rev. was blacked out), spending this year at STAGEStheatre.
Although it ain't much—if you call bare breasticles, live music, blackface, and a skewering of holiday traditions and events of the past year not much—it's the second-longest holiday theater tradition in Orange County, next to something at South Coast Repertory. And way cheaper. In every conceivable way.
It happens one night only—Dec. 21—which is most likely one night too many. But it isn't the only holiday show on tap this season. We checked in with the Rev. and got his skinny on the others. (Full disclosure: The Rev. Slappy White is neither a reverend nor the old-school black comedian who performed on the Chitlin' Circuit along with Redd Foxx. In fact, he doesn't truly exist. Though some have said he speaks to them in dreams. Really bad dreams. Oh, also: I've been involved with this debacle since year one.)
A CHRISTMAS CAROL. Four versions of Charles Dickens' timeless novella are on the boards, ranging from SCR's ridiculously well-appointed version starring living legend Hal Landon Jr. to a musical version at the Camino Real Playhouse to more stripped-down versions at the Mysterium and the Long Beach Playhouse. Rev. White: “Who was on more precursor LSD: Scrooge or the hack who wrote this?” South Coast Repertory, 655 Town Center Dr., Costa Mesa, (714) 708-5555; www.scr.org. Through Dec. 27; Mysterium
Theater, 311 S. Euclid Ave., La Habra, (714) 505-3454; www.mysteriumtheater.com. Through Sun.; Camino Real Playhouse, 31776 El Camino Real, San Juan Capistrano, (949) 489-8082; www.caminorealplayhouse.org. Through Sat.; Long Beach Playhouse, 5021 E. Anaheim St., Long Beach, (562) 494-1014; www.lbplayhouse.org. Through Sun.
SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS
High art at its finest, this parody of one of the high points of American film history is now in its eighth (at least) straight year. And you can buy beer in the theater. Rev. White: “Beer? I'm in.” Maverick Theater, 110 E. Walnut, Fullerton, (714) 526-7070; www.mavericktheater.com. Through Sat.
CHRISTMAS AT THE CHANCE
They're no dummies in the flat part of Anaheim Hills, as three shows with Christmas angles are on tap: She Loves Me, an old-school Broadway hit with an ending set during Christmas, runs through Dec. 28; A Celtic Holiday, a world premiere of a Celtic-themed blend of theater and music, runs through Tuesday; and The Eight: Reindeer Monologues returns in its irreverent and kinky (if sexy anthropomorphic reindeer is your idea of kinky) sauce through Saturday. Rev. White: “Yes, that is my idea of kinky.” Chance Theater, 5522 E. La Palma Ave., Anaheim Hills, (714) 777-3033; chancetheater.com.
WINTER WONDERETTES
A sequel of sorts to the Off-Broadway hit The Marvelous Wonderettes, this musical revue of holiday standards is infused with a 1960s party vibe. Rev. White: “Which 1960s—the Technicolor-drugs-and-free-love part, or the black-and-white part?” Stagedoor Repertory, 1045 N. Armando St., Anaheim, (714) 630-7378; www.stagedoorrep.org. Through Sun.
IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE: A LIVE RADIO PLAY
The film that continues to supply the hoi polloi with heaping doses of Capracorn (and, really, who doesn't love it?) gets the old-school treatment. Basically, you're in the studio audience watching a group of actors speak into microphones and stuff. And there's a liquor store two doors down. Rev. White: “Liquor store? I'm in.” STAGEStheatre, 300 E. Commonwealth, Fullerton, (714) 525-4484; stagesoc.org. Through Dec. 28.
ELEVENTH ANNUAL HOLIDAY MELODRAMA
It's 1955, and the Long Beach Pike is threatened by a new park down the street in this installation of Jamie Sweet's epic melodrama cycle. Rev. White: “So Long Beach is part of Orange County now?” Garage Theatre, 251 E. Seventh St., Long Beach, (562) 433-8337;
thegaragetheatre.org. Through Sat.
A GALLERY FAMILY CHRISTMAS
A cabaret-style parody of songs and sketches. Rev. White: “If it's not suitable for the Manson family, I'm probably out.” Gallery Theatre, 3152 E. La Palma, Anaheim, (714) 630-9870; www.thegallerytheatre.com. Through Sun.
LAST CHRISTMAS I GAVE YOU MY HEART BUT THE VERY NEXT DAY YOU SAID YOU WERE GAY
This is the seventh year of OC's lone LGBT theater mounting this mash-up of Christmas tunes. It received a positive review in OC Weekly last week. Rev. White: “OC Weekly? Who reads that infernal rag?” Theatre Out, 402 W. Fourth St., Santa Ana, (714) 220-7069; www.theatreout.com. Through Sat.
Joel Beers has written about theater and other stuff for this infernal rag since its very first issue in, when was that again???