June 23-30

Thurs/June 23: The best thing I have ever—ever—seen on a stage took place in the basement of an abandoned Long Beach hotel: it was Harold&Maude, performed Kabuki-style, and it was fucking something. Now here comes The Grand Kabuki of JapanChikamatsu-za, featuring living national treasure Nakamura Ganjiro III in SonezakiShinju(The Love Suicides of Sonezaki). It sounds much more serious, with the love suicides and all. It also sounds longer. 8 p.m. $65-$125. Cerritos Center for the Performing Arts, 12700 Center Court Dr., Cerritos, (800) 300-4345; www.cerritoscenter.com.

Fri: If Tony Hawk's Boom Boom Huck Jamat thePondwere free, I'd throw you a bone and send you over there. But it's not. It's $25 to $85. To watch skateboarders.
Fuck that noise.

For $27.50-$30 you can go see BoDiddleyat the Mouse House of Blues. I stayed for Diddley headlining the Hootenannyone year only because I felt I should, that it would be goodfor me. Well, he may have terrorized his local backup musicians, but that man also delivered two hours of the sexiest, most ridiculously funny self-lionization. There is simply not an excuse in the world not to bring yourself some joy. 8 p.m. 1530S.DisneylandDr.,Anaheim,(714)778-BLUE.

Sat: Are you part of the Trailer Trash Nation? No? I wish you weren't a liar. Check out MobileSpacesat The Camp, with a vintage trailer show—Airstreams, Land Yachts, Road Chiefs, House Carsand more—live music, a barbecue and probably a whole bunch of shit to buy. I still don't approve of mall events, but did I mention this one has trailers? A psychic told me once I'd fall in love in a trailer. Before or after serving up my special fried Spamsandwiches and losing three teeth to meth remained untold. Noon-5 p.m. TheCamp,2937BristolSt.,CostaMesa.

Sun:Unfortunately, I can't send you to the IrishFairat IrvineMeadows(8800 IrvineCenterDr.,Irvine,818-901-0230.10a.m.-7p.m.$10-$16)because the only good thing about the Irish sure ain't the food: it's the way their men coo your name, rolling it around their tongues like just the sound of it will give them pleasure for days. Instead, go see your LosAngelesAngelsofAnaheimvs. your Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles. Beat LA! 1:05 p.m. See website for ticket prices. Angel Stadium, 2000 Gene Autry Way, Anaheim, (888) 796-HALO; anaheim.angels.mlb.com.

Mon: Hey, it's Monday. Unless you want to see NewFiat Detroit(again!), you can't get much better than the GaryHoganTriowith Hogan on trumpet and bass, man about town JorgDubinon drums, and FredCarrollon piano, at Partners Bistro. It sounds quite posh, really, if you like posh, and you know you sort of sometimes do. 7-10 p.m. 448 South Coast Hwy., Laguna Beach, (949) 497-4441.

Tues: Yeah, so Movin'Outis based on the music of Billy Joel. But it's still rock N roll to me! Oh, that was soweak. Legendary TwylaTharpdirects and choreographs. 8 p.m. $21.25-$65.75. Orange County Performing Arts Center, Segerstrom Hall, 600 Town Center Dr., Costa Mesa, (714) 556-2122; www.ocpac.org.

Wed: Come check out multimedia legend and photographer Douglas Kent Hallat Sholik's Studio, sponsored by Zuma Press. Known for his rock photos and early pix of Arnold Schwarzenegger's manboobs, Hall and his work shouldn't be missed—unless for some reason you object, like I do, to having to bring your own beer and food. 7 p.m. social hour, 8 p.m. presentation. 1946E.Blair,SantaAna,(949)250-9275.

Thurs/June 30: I didn't know who NikkaCostawas when MartinBrownfrom LiveMagazineand the OrangeCountyMusicAwardstook me to her show. Stupid me. The girl's sexy like a young Tina Turner, while her voice is a mix of Macy Grayand Fiona Apple, and she will rock your ass and her own cha-chas until you're down and begging. Hurt me, Nikka Costa! I still regret having licked the ear of that one DJ from KIIS-FM, especially once he actually opened his mouth and spoke, but sometimes (cue Gloria Estefan) the rhythm gets you. With Drive Blind. $15. 8 p.m. All ages. Galaxy Concert Theatre, 3503 S. Harbor Blvd., Santa Ana, (714) 957-0600; www.galaxytheatre.com.

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