The Orange County Sheriff's Department received a call just after 10 a.m. Sunday from a distressed individual at Crossline Church, 23331 Moulton Parkway, Laguna Hills.
Passing by the pews was a fellow who claimed he was Jesus Christ risen from the dead, and he had a message you won't find in Sunday school coloring books.
The modern-day Prince of Peace said he's going to kill President Barack Obama.
The Secret Service has apparently been made aware of the threats.
Of course, the Secret Order of the Illuminati already knew about the threats–before they were made!
No other description of Jesus 2.0 was available.