First they came for the front porch beer drinkers, and I did not speak out—
Because I don’t have a front porch.
Then they came for the beach smokers, and I did not speak out—
Because I don’t smoke at the beach due to the lack of a pocket for a lighter in my Speedos.
Then they came for the plastic shopping bags, and I did not speak out—
Because I own tons of stock in canvas.
Then they came for my plastic straws—And there was no one left to slurp for me.
Yes, fans of bans, do-gooders are at it again in Huntington Beach, where there is a bid to make Surf City California’s first municipality to go straw-free.
The Pollination Project, a nonprofit that gives $1,000 a day to individual “change-makers” worldwide, recently awarded a grant to Diana Lofflin, the founder of StrawFree.org. Her Huntington Beach ocean conservation group wants plastic straws exchanged out in the city in favor of “alternative, more sustainable solutions.”
Lofflin, who is described as a member of the surfer community, apparently had her mellow harshed at a beach cleanup, where a bunch of stray straws were strewn about in the sand. She and other StrawFree.org volunteers now host educational booths at schools and community events, where they hand out reusable bamboo straws to those who plan to pooh-pooh plastic.
“What most people don’t realize is that plastic lasts forever,” Lofflin says in release. “Thanks to the Pollination Project, this grant will help us increase our education efforts and get more people talking about plastic pollution.”
Would you like to help make HB straw free or otherwise work toward eliminating the plastic instruments of suck? Visit StrawFree.org. For more about The Pollination Project, check out ThePollutionProject.org.
Matt Coker has been engaging, enraging and entertaining readers of newspapers, magazines and websites for decades. He spent the first 13 years of his career in journalism at daily newspapers before “graduating” to OC Weekly in 1995 as the paper’s first calendar editor. He went on to be managing editor, executive editor and is now senior staff writer.