Go to Trader Sam's now, before everyone figures out it's there, before the whole world realizes this is a free-admission Tiki Room where hard alcohol is served. Make no bones: Trader Sam's is the most fun you can have on Disney property without spending a dime on a park ticket and the best thing at the Disneyland Hotel since Dancing Waters was eighty-sixed.
The totem poles have googly eyes that move. And the whole room feels alive, and actually is. What animatronic magic happens around you is linked to what drinks you and your fellow customers order. Ask for the Shipwreck on the Rocks and a pirate ship sinks with a glug glug glug. Sip the Shrunken Zombie Head and you'll feel as though you are actually shrinking…thanks to a stool that's rigged to lower slowly. Care to guess what happens to the volcano when the Krakatoa Punch is served?
Our favorite drink, however, is heralded by nothing but a well-executed pun. There is one catch: when you order the Tiki Tiki Tiki Tiki Tiki Rum, it must be done by reciting all the “Tikis.” If you don't, they'll make you do it again right. Once you surrender your dignity and say it properly, you discover that the drink is the Disney version of pina colada, with reserve rum, cream of coconut, pineapple and orange juices generously dusted on top with cinnamon and nutmeg. It is the only drink that doesn't come garnished with a veritable fruit hat, but it is as satisfying as chowder, creamy as sin and as refreshing as the bar is fun fun fun!