Coachella 2017 By The Minute: Weekend 2


2:50 p.m. A woman sits in her car smoking a cigarette at the tennis gardens waiting for her friend to come back with wristbands. There’s a sign on the back window that reads “Just left cheating fiancé. MUST PARTY! Please Help!” She looked at me with a disheartening look in her eyes, as I stopped and (awkwardly) stared at the signage on her car.

“Are you hangin’ in there?” I asked.

“I just need to get into the festival,” she said in a dismal tone, as she puffed a drag of her cigarette.

I ran into the tennis gardens to get my wristband. Once I got back to my car I realized just how much weed I had with me. I also had a few (now warm) beers, too. I rifled through my car at panic speed to find the goods before she left. I put the cannabis in a red solo-cup because I didn’t know what else to put it in. I sprinted from my car to her car and managed to almost eat shit along the way. I handed her the cup of nuggetry and beer through her window.

“You’re really giving this to me?”

I smiled and nodded.

“This is the nicest thing anyone’s ever done. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

Boom Shaka! Spreading the love is essence of Coachella. (Mary Carreon)

3:21 Following the masses through the dusty parking lot on the way into Coachella both feels and looks like people seeking refuge inside of a walled city during a zombie movie. (Josh Chesler)

3:37 Trying to wrap my head around how so many people woke up and simultaneously thought “I’m not going to wear any pants today.” (Eran Ryan)

3:40 Two friends walking as a rickshaw driver rides by playing Big Meech’s song “Thicka Than a Snicka”
One guy knows line for line, even the ad libs in the background.
Friend: how do you know those lyrics?
Cooler friend: I know a few things, Nicholas! (Nate Jackson)

3:42 “I accidentally told my mom I did cocaine here once, and I got in so much trouble…” – A stereotypical blonde Coachella attendee as she goes through security (JC)

3:44 Someone’s getting pregnant this weekend. “I lost my birth control at Coachella” will make for a great conception story. (ER)

4:00 Dropping an open water bottle on the ground should be punishable by death in this heat! (NJ)

4:05 Watching all of the posing, jumping in the air and “candid” dancing that people put into their Snapchats and Instagram photos is both exhausting and commendable. I didn’t even know what I want for dinner. (ER)

4:10 Guy gets caught with the extra pat down from the guards after crossing through the last checkpoint. I see them reaching in his back pocket and taking out a few pre-rolled joints. Ugh, so close man! Bummer. (NJ)

4:15 It’s so hot that people are searching for shade in the dildo garden. (NJ)

4:16  King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard is on now, and Tacocat starts in like 30 minutes. These may be the best-named competing sets in Coachella history. (JC)

4:52 Among all of the food and beer vendors, the Cupcake Vineyards truck is selling cups of wine with popsicles in them. The only way this could be better is if there were actual cupcakes. (JC)

5:08 I’m sorry, but if you need a paper map to get from the Coachella stage to the Outdoor stage, you’re going to be in for a long weekend. (JC)

5:17 Even though I’m way too sober to really enjoy this trippy, 3D short film in the Antarctic Dome, I do very much enjoy the screams of the heavily intoxicated viewers in the audience. (ER)

5:39  It’s good to see that the Sahara tent is as big of a shitshow as ever. Some things never change. (JC)

5:44 The filler DJ ahead of Crystal Castles is essentially just playing through Chris Brown’s entire discography and the amount of dudes dropping it low and dancing it out is impressive. (JC)

5:59 “This smells like a child’s vagina! Wait — that didn’t sound right.” – A girl using Sephora brand antibacterial wipes. (ER)

6:02 Crystal Castles is dressed as though they needed to be on stage by 6 but still plan to go rob a bank at 7. (ER)

6:17 I know I’m late on this, but the Antarctic dome might be the trippiest thing I’ve ever seen (and I’m almost completely sober). (JC)

6:39 The last thing I expected to see this weekend was another girl’s vagina. This festival is full of surprises, and it’s only the first day. (ER)

6: 45 The guys in Shannon and the Clams are laying down the ‘60s Soul looking like the Flying Burrito Brothers with Shannon holding down bass, looking like a cast member of Mad Men…pretty sure she could kick Don Draper’s ass. (NJ)

6:47 I want to know what kind of sorcery Oh Wonder practices. They’re flawless every time i see them perform and their ability to evoke all of the feels with one chord is pure witchcraft. (ER)

6:53 Just saw a shirtless bro humping the back of his passed out friend’s head and then a girl go crotch first into the back of another dude’s head while trying to leapfrog over him. Happy Coachella, people. (JC)

7:19 Guy in the back of the Sonora stage wiping his red eyes as Kevin Bivona, the guitarist of the Interrupters, strikes the opening chord of theory opening song “A Friend Like Me” for a packed, raucous crowd. Talk about a punk rock alarm clock! (NJ)

7:24 There’s a guy selling water bottles on the yellow path— a dusty, windy road that leads festivalgoers onto the grounds.

“It’s 100% organic,” he yells to passersby, “and it’s 100% cruelty-free.”

A girl with a flower-crown stops in front of him: “Wait, organic water exists?” (MC)

7:36 The Sonora stage might be my favorite stage here, but they put it so far away from everything else that I think I need an Uber to get back from it. The Interrupters continue to be one of the best young punk bands though. (JC)

8:14 Between Mac DeMarco and Father John Misty, Coachella is proving that it can market to the whitest of white people without having to offer a single Unicorn Frappuccino. (JC)

8:16 I spy with my little eye a group of young festival-ers skipping around in a circle with their hands interlaced singing “Ring around the rosy.” I know y’all are having a good time, but that song is horribly depressing. Don’t ruin the Coachella-vibes please. (MC)

8:21 Here’s hoping Phantogram brings out Big Boi, who then brings out Andre 3000, who then announces an Outkast reunion, new album and tour this year. A girl can dream. (ER)

9:15 The XX fans lose their minds over a sound that is so dark and mellow it feels like someone swapped my molly with Xanax. (NJ)

9:18 Grown Man 1: “We can’t leave [the beer garden] with our drinks. We have to finish them.” Grown Man 2: “But I want to Snapchat over there! Why do we have to finish them?!” (JC)

9:29 The XX is playing. Little Dragon is playing and Phantogram is playing. This feels like Coachella 2010-2011. Remember when you could buy single day tickets for $90? (MC)

10:02 I just inhaled a dirt clod. Seems like a case of Coachella lung is coming on strong and fast this year. (MC)

9:36 The XX is trying to induce seizures with strobe lights spread throughout the festival grounds. (ER)

9:39 It’s only a matter of time before Coachella is just a split between EDM acts and the hipster-rock bands that make me sleepy (like The XX and Tame Impala). (JC)

9:52 Travis Scott may not be the most talented rapper alive, but his energy is perfect for a giant festival. The kids are here for it. (JC)

10:19 Why are there so many people at the pseudo-intergalactic generic trash heap known as Empire of the Sun? The Sahara tent is overflowing right now. (JC)

10:27  “Is your hair getting longer? I feel like your hair is getting longer. It’s definitely grown since I last saw you, and that was just like a few months ago.” Yep, drunk girl, that’s typically how hair works. (ER)

10:38 Radiohead is set to take the stage any second and both Travis Scott and Empire of the Sun were definitely more crowded than this. Seems like ol’ Thom Yorke doesn’t translate quite as well with some of the kids. (JC)

11:10 Radiohead creates a symphony of sound that attaches to the soul and permeates all the chakras, simultaneously aligning and cleansing them. Although many people—even Radiohead fans—attribute this to frontman Thom Yorke, I’d have to respectfully disagree. It’s not necessarily because of Thom that Radiohead’s music is so profoundly moving. It’s actually Johnny Greenwood. (MC)

11:26  Honestly, Radiohead live just doesn’t do it for me. I know they’re wonderful and I like their records, but they don’t bring a whole lot of energy to a giant festival setting. (JC)

11:30 I don’t know if it’s clear to anyone else, but I’m almost positive Johnny Greenwood’s an alien. He doesn’t open his eyes. He doesn’t look at the crowd. He doesn’t hold the guitar the way other guitarists do. He doesn’t play the strings traditionally, either—he moves his hands up and down the neck in a way I’ve never seen anyone else do. He hunches over the piano like a mad scientist (who studies aliens) when he plays, with his long hair flowing over his eyes. The noises he swoons from his guitar doesn’t sound like a guitar. Rather, it sounds like a noise fit for the Jetsons in a galaxy far, far away. Greenwood’s an extraterrestrial maestro. Makes sense that he’d spend the last two weekends in the desert. (MC)

11:46 Only at Coachella will you be offered $20 and designer drugs in exchange for driving an inebriated Canadian bro back to his weekend rental. (ER)

12:10 So ready to introduce my Weekend 2 squad to the wonders of the Turn Down Tent. Ready for some chill vibes after a long Day 1. (NJ)

12:37 a.m.  I gave some Canadian kid a ride back to the mansion he and his friends are staying in because he got too high and lost the group he was with. It was both my good deed for the month and a relatively quick way to earn $35 as an amateur Uber driver. (JC)

12:45 A large mass of people are heading toward the campgrounds and exit. “This is unbelievable,” a freaked out festivalgoer said to his friend.

“Yeah. Definitely a heard mentality.”

HA! Get it?! ( For those of you who don’t, Heard Mentality used to be the name of this blog)


3:48 p.m. I seem to have a longstanding tradition of arriving at festivals just late enough to miss Banks & Steelz no matter how hard I try to get there for them. Regardless, Wu-Tang is still both for the children and forever. (JC)

3:57 If you thought the crowd yesterday was showing off and showing out, they’ve since hydrated and adapted to the heat. The clothes are really coming off now. (ER)

4:32 If Chicano Batman isn’t the suavest band at Coachella, I don’t know who is. (JC)

4:46 “Two Door Cinema Club — I don’t know if you’ve heard of them, but they’re next.” (ER)

5:37 A random blonde girl just asked me if I knew where to get drugs. Apparently, I still look like a guy who would know even when I’m completely sober. Maybe it was the Adventure Time tank top. (JC)

5:40 Dude hops out of his Uber to take a piss at the front of the line for car parking. As the line moves up, with the car door still open, traffic cop just stares and shakes his head as the guy buckles his pants and jumps back in the the Uber. These people, I swear…(NJ)

5:59 Something about the exposed chesticles and bare asses at the DoLab totally shouts “child-friendly environment.” At least you’ll have someone to hold your belongings while you go shuffle to your favorite tune. Parents of the year over here. (ER)

6:00 ANOTHER fucking scalper. “Anybody selling their wrist band?” Yeah bruh, I’m sure someone there’s someone in this crowd who was hoping you could take their place on Saturday night so they could go back to the hotel and take an 8 hour nap until their friends get back. (NJ)

6:10 Two guys talking as they’re walking into the festival hyping themselves up for RepeatChella. “I like coming second weekend, honestly. Weekend 1 is all boujee and shit. Weekend 2 is the real festival.” (NJ)

6:15 The lines at the entrance are getting pretty savage. Somebody started a fake line near us to get in at the Yellow path checkpoint a bunch of people followed now all the people in the real line start throwing water bottles at them. (NJ)

6:41 Do Lab is always one of the most interesting parts of Coachella, and the backstage area is even better. We’re all eating free pizza with some DJ (who apparently really likes pizza). (JC)

7:15 The sun is setting behind the mountains and the moon is about to begin her reign over the sky. There are few clouds in the sky. They’re wispy and reflecting a heavenly golden pink. There’s honestly nothing better than a Coachella sunset, especially when Tycho’s earthy, electronic sounds are the soundtrack to watching colorful clouds melt into a night sky spangled with stars. (MC)

7:18 There are probably only a few hundred people watching Dreamcar right now. No doubt they lit a fire inside every person in the audience though. You’re welcome. (JC)

7:34 Davey Havok looks like a mob boss straight out of Grand Theft Auto: Vice City with his teal and pink suit and Clark Gable mustache. It almost seems like he’s playing a character as a warm-up for another Broadway run, but the saxophonist just stole the show with her solo. (JC)

7:40 One of the biggest Coachella 2017 fashion rumors was that festivalgoers (mostly female, I’d imagine) were going to debut a new trend: the glitter butt. (Yes, you read that correctly.) But I’ve yet to witness anything of the sort… except for a guy in his mid-20s who has a glitter beard. (Yes, you also read that correctly.) To say his long, dark facial hair was covered in glitter is an understatement. His face literally glistened like a disco ball on steroids. Even if he shaves his face after this weekend, the glitter won’t be gone. He’ll have a piece of Coachella with him forever (and ever.). (MC)

7:48 The girls in front of me are stretching between Future’s features in preparation for the next twerk-worthy track. (JC)

7:56 Future easily has the biggest crowd of the weekend so far, and just about everyone here is adamant about their imaginary Gucci flip-flops. (JC)

8:00 To the group of people sprinting to what looks like the Outdoor Stage: You’re going to give yourself and someone else a concussion when you eventually run into another person head-on. DON’T RUN THROUGH CROWDS AT FESTIVALS! Unless, of course, you’re running from security. Or the cops. (MC)

8:11 Overheard in the food lines: “Okay, do you want to eat carbs or protein? Like, do you want French fries or meat?” (ER)

8:22 The second weekend of Coachella is better solely for the fact that Drake didn’t ruin Future’s set this evening. What a time to be alive. (JC)

8:30 Warpaint is playing in the Gobi, and they’re psychedelically rocking it. There’s a woman in her mid-50s who’s swinging her head back and forth in a head-banging fashion who seems like she should be a part of the band or something. She is singing every word to every song. I hope to be like her when I’m 50. (MC)

8:43 Who told Schoolboy Q he was allowed to take off his bucket hat? Doesn’t he remember what happened to Nelly when he ditched the band-aid? (JC)

8:55 SchoolBoyQ playing to his biggest crowd yet at Coachella. Outdoor stage is packed as his busts out “Break the Bank” on a smoky stage and a video of an ATM spitting out dollar bills as he raps.

“I just wanna smoke weed and sip lean by the quart, for real
Good weed, I hit that, crack rock, I sold that
Oxy, I hid that, right by my nutsack.”

Something tells me he would’ve really enjoyed our Coachella drug and music guide. (NJ)

9:17 Three people are knocked and laying in the middle of the polo field. The fact that I’m sure no one will step on them is part of the reason I still like this festival. (NJ)

9:30 Once again, the DoLab this year is in the very back of the festival, away from everything. It feels like its own little village. There’s no major sound bleed from the other stages and the structure is massive. It’ unlike any of the Do Lab stages before and, apparently, it’s going to make it’s debut at Lightning In a Bottle next month. (MC)

9:53 The $15 buffalo chicken sandwich (which featured special guests coleslaw and a buttery bun) was outstanding. Definitely more exciting than Bon Iver. Also, “Bon Iver” is being pronounced three different ways in the conversations near me. (JC)

10:00 Walking through the crowd from the bathrooms to the Mojave, the smell of herb floated through the air and up my nose. There was a lot of joint smoking, going on. It was easy to smell the different variations coming from different groups of people. But there was one scent of smoked herb that smelled different from the rest. It was extra sour and fruity. The image that popped into my head as soon as I got a whiff of it was pink lemonade, or a pink Warhead sour candy. It stopped me in my tracks. I looked around to see where it was coming from, but I couldn’t find it. What ever strain of weed that was, though, is impressive. I hope I find you smokers tomorrow. (MC)

10:19 Last week DJ Snake brought out Lauryn Hill and literally everyone else who was already backstage and this week we get a brief dancing appearance from Dillon Francis? Weak. (JC)

10:35 The Gucci Mane crowd crush at the Sahara tent right now is ridiculous…for everyone who doesn’t give a fuck about Lady Gaga, he is definitely the unofficial headliner tonight. (NJ)

10:40 Oh shit, the DJ’s power goes out during Gucci Mane’s set. Sounds like a bad case of Radiohead’s Disease. A few minutes later they fix the problem. Everything’s Gucci again. (NJ)

10:43 I’m in a sea of Little Monsters. (JC)

10:50 Nicholas Jaar makes my Solar Plexus tingle so hard. (MC)

11:15 Gaga’s fans are upset that she’s a few minutes late for her set. They’re trying to start chants and sing the chorus of “Bad Romance” to get her to magically appear. You know who would’ve been on time? Beyonce. (JC)

11:40 I’m not a little monster, but I really respect Lady Gaga as a performer. Anyone who can play the Keytar is automatically really fucking cool. (MC)

11:44 Queen Bey never would’ve subjected us to the use of a keytar for one of her most popular songs. (JC)

12:06 I’m legitimately trying my hardest not to shed big ol’ crocodile tears right now. There’s a very real chance that I might cry at a Lady Gaga concert and I can’t handle this truth. (ER)

12:27 a.m. Lady Gaga live is kind of the pop equivalent to Marilyn Manson, although I see her going the Cher route in the future. (JC)

12:30-2:00 I’ve been looking for my car for an hour and a half, and I don’t think I’m going to find it. I’m going to die out here from Coachella lung and people giving me wrong directions to 1B. Sorry Yellow Lot, but fuck you. (MC)

12:39 The only way this performance could be any better is if Britney Spears were to leap from the rafters to show everyone who the real queen of hair twirling and hip thrusting is. (ER)

1:01 “What the fuck is wrong with this ecstasy? I was high as shit now I’m sober as fuck!” (ER)

1:56 Coachella just managed to get something like 80,000 people out of a parking lot in about an hour, and there’s not a single venue in OC that could even come close to that. (JC)


1:34 There’s a girl walking barefoot across the sweltering parking lot in this 100 degree weather and I can’t help but cringe with each step she takes. Luckily she’s a natural blonde and clearly unphased in her decision. (ER)

2:08 The fields are so hot and so empty right now that I’m not completely sure I didn’t take a wrong turn and end up on Tattooine. (JC)

2:29 The popsicle vendors are dying in this heat and are probably going to eat through their supply before they have a chance to make a profit. (ER)

2:51 I thought Ezra Furman would just be like every other hipster rock band here, but I’m pleasantly surprised. (JC)

3:12 There’s some guy here backstage who looks more like a rabbi than a rock star, but people are just swarming him. Did Matisyahu get really old all of a sudden? (JC)

4:04 I’ve seen three different girls in rainbow bikinis so far today. It’s nice they’re busting out their church attire for Sunday. (JC)

4:17 What happens to the giant chandeliers in the Gobi and Mojave tents for the other 49 weeks out of the year? I’ve got pretty high ceilings in my apartment, if one of them needs a home. (JC)

4:22 There’s a toddler up on someone’s shoulders misting people dancing near her in the Gobi tent. It’s both adorable and alarming that she knows what’s up. (ER)

5:02 It seems like the DoLab stage is the biggest and best party every day of every year of Coachella now. There are kids who buy wristbands almost exclusively for it, and I can’t really blame them. The Sahara tent wishes it was this cool. (JC)

5:21 Made friends with a drunk Yeastie Boys employee. Was hoping to get some free bagels, but instead learned about her journey across the country and her upcoming divorce planned for 2019. (ER)

5:26 Bagel girl: “There’s a whole underground bartering system between the food vendors that you don’t even know about. I always make an introduction on the sly first, like ‘Yo…you like bagels? Let’s talk.’ Bagels are seriously the most valuable form of currency.” (ER)

5:46 There are so many girls taking their “Oh fuck, I forgot to take a mandatory stereotypical Coachella photo” photos. Duck face and peace signs for all. (JC)

5:57 Grouplove seems like they’d be fun to hang out with. Don’t ask me why. They just do. (JC)

6:00 HONNE is in the Mojave tent putting everyone in the baby-making mood. Don’t try to fight it — you will be coupled up by the end of their set. (ER)

6:05 This is the latest I’ve gone into the festival all weekend but honestly I’m fine with it. By Day 3 (of my second weekend here), I’m starting to feel like I’m in a hipster version of Ground Hog Day. (NJ)

6:15 Guy on the walk in: Drake has to come out at some point again this weekend right? He can’t just do Weekend 1. He has to come out!!! Right?

Drake’s response:


6:29 There’s something kind of Morrissey-esque about the singer of Future Islands. Maybe it’s the bitter look and receding hairline, but it’s not a bad thing. (JC)

6:33 It took three days, but I finally spotted the infamous Native American Coachella headdress. Seriously, people still wear these? (ER)

7:05 Twin Peaks hosting a chill, summer kick back in the Sonora tent as girls hop up on stage and start dancing to their ’70s pro to punk grooves. (NJ)

7:20 Kinda crazy that the first guitarist I’ve seen try to crowd surf all weekend is at the very back of the festival in the Sonora stage. Rock may be dying a slow death at the rest of Coachella this year, but in here it’s alive and well. (NJ)

7:25 Of course DJ Khaled found a way to incorporate his adorable baby into the opening video montage multiple times. (ER)

7:27 So DJ Khaled is pretty much just yelling the main lines of the choruses of his biggest hits into the microphone. He’s not even DJing, and he’s already bragging about the special guests he’s going to bring out. (JC)

7:35 Girl drops her slice of Spicy Pie directly face down on the grass, picks it up, looks around, dusts it off and goes right back to eating it. No worries, boo. I ain’t mad atcha. That Spicy Pie is still good. (NJ)

7:58 I just went from DJ Khaled to Hans Zimmer in about a three-minute span, which may be the biggest jump in musical talent per second in Coachella history. (JC)


8:10 Trap style remixes of Hans Zimmer scores would probably be the most gangsta shit of all time. Somebody do that, please! (NJ)

8:09 A good 40 percent of the Hans Zimmer crowd is just really high kids trying to figure out how to dance to the Pirates of the Caribbean score. (JC)

8:20 Hearing the Lion King live is emotional. I’m becoming super sentimental having flashbacks to watching the movie when I was four-years-old. I’m trying not to cry, which seems to be the general consensus in the crowd. Couples clasp onto each other, while others put their hands on top of each other over their heart. The Lion King is emotional. Coachella is beautiful. I vote for more orchestras and fewer DJs at Coachella. (MC)

8:15 While Hans Zimmer was performing scores from the Lion King, a group of seven people with light up balloons became the sub-performance during the show. They looked like jumping beans or sardines out of water, as they vigorously waved their balloons around over their heads and jumped in pogo-stick fashion. People laughed around them. They were the biggest Hans Zimmer fans not in the front. They were the Lion Kings and Queens. (MC)

8:46 The only thing more gangster than T.I.’s “What You Know” is the entirety of The Dark Knight soundtrack. (ER)

8:47 Lorde is starting up on the main stage and Hans Zimmer’s audience is leaving in flocks now that they heard the music from every important scene in The Lion King. (JC)

9:00 Walking through the crowd to get to the press tent from Hans Zimmer I overheard a group people talking about their nipples. “My aeriola is this big,” as she used her thumb and index finger as an outline on her breast. The girls in the group start laughing, while the guys in the group smile but are silent. “So, then you have dark ones…?” her friend replied. (MC)

9:09 Lorde put out one album, went on hiatus, then got an invite to perform at Coachella ahead of Taylor Swift. As Beyoncé would say, “Bow down, bitches.” (ER)

9:15 This was the first time I brought my computer to Coachella. The soundtrack to my writing is Hans Zimmer. It’s really helped me get into the flow. As the orchestra speeds up I can feel my concentration increase, as well as the speed of my so my writing. When the music slows I can feel my intensity decline. Im writing to the ebb and flow of Hans Zimmer and it’s beautiful. (MC)

9:27 I’m eating Chinese food in the beer garden and watching Lorde. This certainly feels pretty royal. (JC)

10:05 This guy with a sleeveless white fur coat at the craft beer garden is 100% Pimpchella. (NJ)

10:27 The next bro I hear say he’s “waiting on Kendrick like the 1st and the 15th” is getting the e-cig knocked out of his mouth. We get it. You know the memorable lines from Kendrick’s biggest hits, call him “K-Dot,” and insist Section.80 is the greatest album of all time even though you can’t name half of the tracks. (JC)

10:38 Damn. (JC)

10:42 Why has nobody thought to incorporate dancing ninjas into their live performance until now? It just seems like a very Dru Hill thing to do. (ER)

10:53 It’s always the smallest girls who go the hardest for rap music, Kendrick especially. (ER)

11:02 Maybe it’s the size of the stage, the distance from LA, or the fact that most of the crowd is just here for the singles, but this performance doesn’t feel like a homecoming for Kendrick nearly as much as FYF did. (JC)

11:14 The Damn Legend of Kung Fu Kenny is the only Rush Hour spin-off I want to see. (JC)

11:28 If I die tonight, the cause of death listed on my coroner’s report will say “Crushed under a car-sized, inflatable rubber ducky during Kendrick Lamar’s performance of ‘Money Trees.’” (ER)

11:41 There’s something strange about watching Kendrick rap about the realities of the streets in a massive festival setting surrounded by thousands of “fans” who were singing every word to DJ Khaled’s karaoke session earlier in the evening. Lady Gaga’s spectacle fit the weekend perfectly, but the nuances and intelligence of this set are being lost on the EDM kids who just wanted to hear “Bitch, Don’t Kill My Vibe” and “Alright.” (JC)

12:00 Turning down for the last time at the Turn Down Tent in the campgrounds. God, I’m gonna miss this place. (NJ)

12:14 Walking past a food vendor on the way back to the car, I overheard the girl behind me describing her biggest turnoff to her friend. “Bacon-wrapped hot dogs look like uncircumcised penises and I just think they’re so gross.” (ER)

12:30 The Arctic Dome is the coolest addition to Coachella. Although it’s cool AF in here, the psychedelic DMT trip it takes you on is maybe the coolest visual experience I’ve ever endured. Hi-five to HP and Coachella for the best technology collaboration ever. (MC)

12:35 And now time for my favorite Coachella performer of the weekend: The Hari Krishna guy playing the finger cymbals in the middle of the entrance to the Yellow Path. Saw him on my way in and now on the way out. To you sir, if you’re reading this— I hope Coachella puts you on the bill next year. (NJ)

12:45 In the darkness of the dreary windswept Yellow Path, I hear someone yell out “Happy Coachella!” The ripple effect is giving me just enough strength to get back to the car. Happy Coachella indeed. (NJ)

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