Beach Goth 2016 By The Minute Review

Beach Goth
The Observatory


2:11p.m. I can already tell these lines to get into The Observatory are going to be a pain in the ass…(Yvonne Villasenor)

3:32 This dude in front of me just took a fat puff off a blunt and chugged a beer during Wild Nothing’s set. Chill bruh, DJ Quik doesn’t go on until later. (YV)

3:54 The mass of people trying to get out of The Observatory comes to a complete halt…no surprise there. A security guard excuses himself and tells people to let others exit and to not enter. One guy doesn’t listen and security calls him “Hatchet-Face.” Daaamn! (YV)

3:58 The beer garden feels more like a sanctuary to flee from all the rowdy ass teens. (YV)

4:30 Creepy clown sighting…killing vibes. (Cynthia Rebodello)

4:55 The Violent Femmes just went on. The push in the crowd is real. (CR)

4:56 “God damn, they’re old!” I hear someone say as the Violent Femmes begin to play (YV)

5:11 This guy behind me is offering to trade his shirt for food. The sun hasn’t even gone down. Too early for this level of festival poverty. (CR)

6:19 Don’t get me wrong, I love Tupac. But if I hear “California Luv” one more time, I’m going to lose it. (YV)

6:31 Patti Smith is a spitter. Pretty sure she’s gonna spit on some hipsters tonight. Good—these kids could use some emotional scarring. (CR)

6:36 An older Asian man right next to me looks up to the sky, prays and says “thank you” as soon as TLC plays “Waterfalls.” I feel you. (YV)

6:45 That fucking clown from earlier is next to me. Help! (CR)

6:50 Showing up to a festival at this hour makes me feel a little guilty, until I see they’ve already got the bacon wrapped hot dog carts sizzling out near the entrance. I buy one and start my festival on a full stomach of bacon-wrapped sustenance. Way to go, me. (Nate Jackson)

6:54 $11 for a pizza that looks like it was made in an Easy-Bake Oven? Nah. I think I’ll starve. (YV)

6:57 Swisher Sweets have a booth right next to local Santa Ana dispensary called New Generation. The brightly colored Dos Chinos truck is slanging fusion tacos just steps away. It’s like the universe WANTS me to stay in this corner of the festival all weekend. Fight the urge. Must see live music. (NJ)

7:10 Patti Smith's passionate and howling voice singing, “Jesus died for our sins but not mine,” is something I never thought I'd get to hear live. It's just bittersweet that I can't see her face from the entrance line I'm currently stuck in. (Denise De La Cruz)

7:11 Some dude just hopped the fence into the festival with no fucks given and under five seconds without getting caught. Bravo, brave sir. (DDLC)

7:35 Melanie Martinez's voice is as sweet as the giant cake alongside her on-stage. (DDLC)

7:40 That fucking panda just sprinted past me… (YV)

8:04 King Krule, who at the tender age of 22, sounds like he's already been through a tough life and a smoker's lung. It looks like he's killing it on stage, now, if only I could actually hear him. (DDLC)

8:07 Backstage at Beach Goth, I run into Growler guitarist Kyle Straka for the first time since last year’s fest. Still bleached blonde. Still cool as fuck #neverchange. (NJ)

8:09 Overheard a guy scold someone and say, “At least say ‘excuse me!’ Damn.” Moments later, he bumps right into me and spills a substantial amount of beer all over me. Excuse you? (YV)

8:10 See DJ Quick or die in line to get into the Observatory trying. (DDLC)

8:40 Fuck this massive tree next to the beer garden for ruining my view of James Blake right now. (NJ)

8:48 If someone else pushes me one more time… (DDLC)

8:58 I’ve seen two people in Super Mario costumes so far: One had a real mustache and a gold earring and looks like he could chug a Miller Hi-Life down real fast. The other, with a fake stache, looks like he’s really good at balancing checkbooks. Get you a Mario who can do both (Nick Nuk’em)

9:09 DJ Quik just dropped and then stomped out his mic in the middle of his set! Fuck that mic I guess… even though I thought it was cool. (NN)

9:10 The Growlers really should be playing the main stage at their own festival. And the sound system on the Outdoor RX Stage doesn’t quite carry those apathetic cool kid stoner vibes far back enough for me to get a proper taste. (NJ)

9:12 “Rihanna better have my money” say DJ Quik and Amg during the 1991 classic and original “Bitch Better Have My Money.” They have a point. (NN)

9:40 Lots of talk, both positive and negative, about the Growlers changing up their lo-fi mashup of reggae, country, psych rock to a more catchy, synth-friendly sound. But listening to “One Million Lovers” next to “I’ll Be Around,” they really haven’t made as big a change as haters would have you believe. If anything, there’s more songs in their set you can actually dance to now. (NJ)

10:04 There’s like 40 fuckin’ people in Bon Iver! They’re like a hip-hop entourage but with people who actually do shit. It looks like a whole men’s rec league team just took the stage. (NN)

10:15 Never get tired of the variety of ways people say the word Bon Iver (Bon I-ver, Bonniver, and my favorite Boneever). (NJ)

10:20 A chick across from me at the main stage looks like DW from Arthur. She’s not dressed in a DW costume, she just looks like her. Aardvarks for Bon Iver, bih! (NN)

10:21 Mike D of the Beastie Boys just walked by me with his son and I am completely starstruck! (DDLC)

10:45 To the wannabe hippie girls waving their hands before the next song starts: relax (NN)

10:52 Titties! (DDLC)

10:55 People waiting in line for the Majid Jordan after party just got a free Bon Iver set. I call that a bargain! (NN)

11:03 “This is totally organized,” says a guy in the mass heard that is the line to enter the Observatory to see Majid Jordan and Chicano Batman play separate late-night shows. (DDLC)


2:01 p.m. It's overcast and drizzling yet yesterday was a scorcher, earthquake weather much? (Denise De La Cruz)

2:03 Beach Goth is likely the only music festival where I can't tell if someone is in a costume or if that's just their usual style of dress. (DDLC)

2:27 Kali Uchis's outfit with a glittery bikini top, denim jeans and a bleach blonde pony tail reminds me of a hood fab Gwen Stefani and Selena concoction. (DDLC)

2:36 Overheard: “you're taking acid…?” “Yeah some guy just gave it to us for free”. Beach Goth really brings out the best in people.  (Nick Nuk’em)

2:39 So far, I've seen 4 guys in dresses. (DDLC)

2:40 The smaller outdoor stage sounds way better since yesterday. It looks like the sound engineer tent is closer to the stage now. Xxyyxx 's beats are melting my face from the same distance I stood yesterday where King Krule's set was barely audible. (DDLC)

2:47 The main stage looks like what would happen if you put all the Saturday school kids from around Southern California in the same place at the same muthafuckin time (NN)

2:54 Umm, why is there a military jet soaring above us?  (DDLC)

3:01 Although crowded, it is pretty convenient that within a few steps I could hop from one stage to another. (DDLC)

3:02 I'm not quite sure what Gucci Mane is saying but I'm trap dancing to it. (DDLC)

3:08 It started drizzling during Gucci Mane's set. Is that considered Gucci… rain? (NN)

3:18 It's raining and I'm the only person wearing a plastic poncho. I keep getting asked if I bought it or brought it. I brought it per my mother's demands. Moms always know best! (DDLC)

3:30 The Adicts win the Beach Goth costume contest, hands down. (DDLC)

3:33 “A nigga forgot the words so just forgive me” requests an intoxicated Brother Marquis from the 2 Live Crew after cutting a song short. “I ain’t tryna cheat y’all,” he insists. (NN)

3:48 Next time they book the 2 Live Crew, can they also book like 200-300 girls to twerk in the audience? Feels like it’d give their set a real vintage feel. (NN)

3:40 The rain isn't letting up, instead, it's starting to pour. All across the festival, Beach Goths are mourning the death of their favorite black leather jackets. (DDLC)

3:42 The people wearing devil horns count is at 10. I see one angel but her halo is black, of course.  (DDLC)

4:15 The rain is coming down pretty hard and these three girls are holding umbrellas and wearing hats, sweatshirts, and…just underwear. Alrighty then. (Yvonne Villasenor)

4:23 Ugly God says his dick game is Bernie Sanders. Does that mean free and for everyone but sure to come up short in the long run? (NN)

4:25 Why does Ugly God look like David Banner from 20 years ago?(NN)

4:28 Heading to the RX stage and there’s a decent sized puddle everyone’s hopping over. Cue the faceplants. (YV)

4:40 I just waited an hour in line to get inside the Observatory for the Pharcyde's set. Once inside, I almost had a panic attack while being squished into an overcrowded hallway. “Do fire hazards not matter?” an aggravated festival goer yells. (DDLC)

4:44 “The 808 started the west coast sound. You know what that means? We started this whole west coast shit,” yells Egyptian Lover (NN)

4:53 Egyptian Lover has been standing still for like two minutes in Egyptian poses. Oh shit, did they just mummify themselves?! (NN)

5:05 The Pharcyde sound just as polished and as youthful as they did 20 plus years ago. The young crowd is loving their vibe without necessarily knowing their lyrics. (DDLC)

5:16 As soon as it’s announced that The Drums are now going to be playing inside because of the rain, the entire crowd groans and books it to The Observatory. (YV)

5:19 The puddles outside have gotten substantially larger and two girls in front of me fall into the puddle after a poor attempt to jump over it. Pobrecitas. (YV)

5:20 The Pharcyde just gave the late great J Dilla a shout out then proceeded to drop, “Passin' Me By” and the whole crowd recited the classic word per word. (DDLC)
5:40 I just saw some young teens pick up OC Weekly's latest “Best Of OC” issue. People do read us! (DDLC)

5:56 The smaller outdoor stage has been shut down due to flooding from the rain. The Drums have been moved to the indoor Observatory stage. People are confused about where the rest of the outdoor stage lineup will be relocated to. (DDLC)

6:20 Future Islands lead singer, Samuel Herring, is beating the shit out of his chest while he sings, on some Wolf of Wall Street shit. That shit don't hurt, bruh? (NN)

6:42 I overhear someone say, “I’m never going to Beach Goth ever again if it’s at The Observatory.” Pretty sure that’s how everyone feels at this point. (YV)

6:53 The crowd for The Drums is so lit, some girl is holding up her crutches in the air. (DDLC)

7:03 Waiting for The Growlers to play and there’s a shit ton of people with glitter on their face. I guess I didn’t get the memo. (YV)

7:10 A young woman just fell into the flooded shit river by the porta potties. People helped her up and applauded as soon as she got back on her feet. I'm hoping someone gets her a bucket of sanitizer. (DDLC)

7:33 Wait, where is Eric Andre? I haven't seen him once this whole weekend. (DDLC)

7:41 When a friendly stranger in the crowd offers you a hit of the spliff, you take it! (DDLC)

7:42 Oh, there's Eric Andre. (DDLC)

7:51 The dudes in dresses count is at 5. (DDLC)

8:12 The Growlers are 40 minutes late to their set but their matching burgundy velvet suits are so cute, it's sort of forgivable. (DDLC)

8:17 Someone just knocked down one of the ATM machines. Guess I’m not the only one who’s hangry. (YV)

8:19 Two guys waiting for RL Grime to come on are arguing over which of them looks most like Fred Armisen. There should probably be a limit on how many bros are allowed to inhabit a certain space simultaneously. Also, neither of them look like the guy.  (NN)

8:20 Brooks says something about not caring about people not feeling The Growler's new sound. At least, I think that's what he said, it's kind of hard to understand his quick mumbling voice. (DDLC)

8:33 There's constant mic distortion in Brooks' vocals yet he pulls through The Growler's short set by singing unfazed. (DDLC)

9:20 I'm standing against a barricade and the couple by me is making out and groping each other and I can feel EVERYTHING. (DDLC)

9:25 Even the event staff in the beer tents by me are dancing to Justice. (DDLC)

9:29 The people wearing devil horns count is at 12. (DDLC)

9:51 There are a pair of jeans on the ground…What the hell is going on? (YV)

9:54 How the hell do these girls in front of me have the energy to dance and scream throughout Justice’s entire set? Kudos, but I can barely keep my eyes open at this point. (YV)

10:00 Justice just played “I'm So Excited” by The Pointer Sisters and all I can think about is the Nutty Professor montage. You know the one. (NN)

One Reply to “Beach Goth 2016 By The Minute Review”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *