Man, why do riots always break out in Orange County whenever I'm away? Last year, it was the Anaheim madness; this year, it was the melee that broke out after the end of the U.S. Open of Surfing in Huntington Beach. I'm still trying to piece together what happened, drunk on bourbon and Derby pie and white dog as I am, but what I'm most upset about right now is the above picture: the aftermath of one of our newspaper racks, destroyed by nameless, faceless monsters who obviously targeted us among our competition for the most ruthless beating imaginable–HATE CRIME!!!
It was a good rack, one that served us more than a decade and was two days away from retirement. I'd always grab a copy of our rag when I passed by–that is, when I could find a copy there, since it was always empty due to people picking up the paper.
I'm furious. To paraphrase Homer's anonymous letter to Bart after Bart had “WIDE LOAD” tattooed on Homer's ass: to whomever destroyed our rack, “I KILL U SCUM.”
But, of course, the best eulogy for the rack was given by none other than Clockwork Coker, who wrote, “Among the most troubling things knocked down and battered were newspaper racks, including one of OC Weekly's that just flashed on the teevee. What kind of monster would hurt one of our innocent racks? Hasn't print taken enough of a beating already?”
The horror, the horror…