What's this? Orange County's favorite adopted ska-punk band Sublime (yup, Long Beach is our favorite adopted LA 'burb) finally got Rockabyed? About time, we say. While Rockabye Baby has been infantilizing your favorite bands' music since 2006 with all the xylophones and bells your baby could need, but never with one this close to our hearts.
Now that Sublime's self-titled breakthrough album is almost 20 years old, everyone who smoked joints to “Santeria” and “Wrong Way” is probably way past the baby-making age. Luckily, our resident baby, Ziggy Bose, is around to judge whether or not the album lives up to its promise.
Ziggy tested it on a road trip from Garden Grove to Long Beach during rush hour and gave us her input, song by song. for the whole hour. She's all of eight weeks old, so not only was Ziggy reviewing the album for its sweet melodies and soothing vibes, but also for its intended effect. Did these Rockaby Baby CDs really put babies to sleep? She was about to find out.
“How's it goin, dude? Tell dad he can turn the radio back on.”
Xylophones, bells, accessory sounds … I like this! Passing gas to this song. Maybe a few mustard-colored poops, too.
2. Wrong Way
Aww yeah. This is my jam for when I'm spitting up my mother's milk.
3. What I Got
I'm 60 days old and already this song is played out. Even if it is cute.
4. Caress Me Down
Mucho gusto, my name is Ziggy. I'm fussier than Ron Jeremy. Who is Ron Jeremy? My parents say this is a naughty song. But it's so cute with the little frog sounds and tweety beats.
5. April 29, 1992 (Miami)
Hey if Orange County was burning, I'd want my mother to go crazy with looters getting some Pampers too!
6. Saw Red
Meh. This makes me think of Gwen Stefani and Blake Sheldon dating.
7. Don't Push
Au contraire, Bradley, this song definitely makes me want to push. That's what diapers are for!
8. Smoke Two Joints
Mom says I have to wait until I've found my center to figure out what this song means. But she keeps making these kissy faces and inhaling nothing.
9. Doin' Time
Feelin' this song. What do you think I feel like when I'm in a crib … or worse, this car seat? Get me outta here!
My dad says you can hear how uniquely Bradley Nowell styled his rhythms and melodies when you hear the songs this way.
11. 40 oz. to Freedom
More like 4 oz. of breast milk…Hyuk hyuk. I'm still not sleepy. What's up with these songs? Why are they called Rockabye Baby if I can't get the zzzs? Let me ask my big brother what he thinks …
12. Rivers of Babylon
Hmm, at least it worked on somebody. What else can you say about these songs? It's the only way my parents can listen to Sublime these days and not have to answer awkward questions about what the lyrics mean.
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