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Here's the plan ... we hit Mega Millions the next Friday it's worth hitting ($100 million, nothing less); we scoop the whole damn thing (no splitting it with a a group of minimum-wage warehouse workers in Wisconsin, most of whom would be broke in 12 months and living with their in-laws); we bag a bargain 4-bed penthouse on the sand in Laguna Beach (within staggering distance of more juice joints than you can shake a swizzle stick at); splurge on a wardrobe of Reyn Spooners, white slacks and sandals; buy the entire Rockford oeuvre, and study upon becoming a beach bum with style.
In anticipation of our upcoming good fortune, we're gonna don our 10-year-old Tommy Bahama number to go slurp a perfectly named libation, the Beachcomber, at Monarch Beach's premier evening destination, the elegant and welcoming Brio Tuscany Grille ... where the live music and dance floor light up five nights a week.
There are only slighter fewer Beachcomber recipes on the web than there are "seemed like a good idea at the time" celebrity sex tapes. Ask Brio's master mixologist Matt for the following: 1 ½ oz. light rum; ½ oz. triple sec; ½ oz. lime juice; dash of Grenadine. Poured into a shaker with ice cubes, agitated well and strained into a chilled cocktail glass, it's a dusky, swirling, maroon concoction of decadent sweetness - sugarcane juice and molasses, bitter and sweet orange peel, concentrated citrus, cherry syrup - with a subtle kick. A couple of these, you'll feel like the monarch of Monarch Beach.
Brio Tuscany Grille 24050 Camino Del Avion, Monarch Beach, (949) 443-1476; www.briorestaurant.com.