Tales From the Underbelly of Disneyland: Not Softballs

Tales From the Underbelly of Disneyland: Not Softballs

For some, Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth. It's a world of wonder and amazement where everyone, young and old alike, can live out the carefree abandon of their youth.

For others, eh, it's a job.

"Tales from the Underbelly of the Happiest Place on Earth" interviews ex-Disney employees about those nine-to-five experiences that go unseen by happy park goers. Peer at Disney's Underbelly after the jump.

What was the grossest thing you ever came across while working at Disneyland?

I was cleaning the Space Mountain restroom one night when I came upon a toilet that was filled with brown water. I couldn't see through the water; it had the consistency of unfiltered apple juice. When it comes to these types of situations you don't want to just flush the toilet and hope for the best, so I opted to attack it with a plunger.

Nothing happened, so I figured it was something big. I grabbed a pair of tongs. Yep, regular old salad tongs, which we frequently used to retrieve items out of urinals that couldn't be flushed. I reached into the murky water with the salad tongs, but when I went to squeeze the tongs shut they wouldn't budge. I pulled the tongs out of the water and realized that I had just grabbed a turd that was the size and shape of a softball. It was just as hard, too.

I called my Lead to have him give me a hand in trying to get the toilet back into shape. "The turds in here are huge," I told him. He had worked in custodial for a while, but he still had no idea how big I was talking about. Maybe he thought I was just trying to be funny when I said they were as big as softballs.

He took a large ball plunger and tried to clear out the toilet. After giving it a couple of thrusts, he pulled the plunger out and looked down into the water. As he peered down into the bowl he realized the plunger was suddenly heavier. He looked into the end of it and noticed that one of the giant turds had lodged itself into the ball plunger. He was stunned.

He grabbed a trash can, reached into the toilet with the tongs, and started to pull out all the turds one by one so the plumbers would be able to snake out the drain. One of the turds he pulled out was roughly the size of a Chipotle burrito and as hard as a rock. I'm not sure what kind of human could squirt out such a thing, or what he/she could possibly have eaten to get those results, but it was definitely a sight to see.

--Anonymous ex-Custodial Cast Member

And, actually, while putting this post up I received the following photo and text from a current Cast Member:
Tales From the Underbelly of Disneyland: Not Softballs

The text simply read: "Unopened and used condoms at entrance east!"

Ah, if those bathroom stall walls could talk.



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