The Orange County Sheriff's Department received a call just after 10 a.m. Sunday from a distressed individual at Crossline Church, 23331 Moulton Parkway, Laguna Hills.
Passing by the pews was a fellow who claimed he was Jesus Christ risen from the dead, and he had a message you won't find in Sunday school coloring books.
The modern-day Prince of Peace said he's going to kill President Barack Obama.
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The Secret Service has apparently been made aware of the threats.
Of course, the Secret Order of the Illuminati already knew about the threats--before they were made!
No other description of Jesus 2.0 was available.