Comedian Jim Norton Wants to Sleep With You, If You Can Stand His Sleep Apnea

Despicable? Hardly. Double guns!
Despicable? Hardly. Double guns!
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Jim Norton's comedy comes across differently than even the most perverted dirty comics. But the one thing everyone can agree on is that when Jim comes, he is funny. OK, that didn't sound right but you know what we meant. He is a comic and radio personality extraordinaire entertaining the masses with the Opie & Anthony Show by day providing beloved characters and plenty of hilarity and then by night, he entertains live crowds touring and with his most recent special on Epix called, "Please Be Offended."

While Jim has made a career out of hating on his looks and talent, when it comes to his fans it's clear to see there is nothing to hate at all. Dirty, sick, and twisted? Sure. Perversely honest? Most definitely. Little Jimmy has big things to say so do yourself a big favor and don't miss him this weekend during his next OC stint from September 13th through 15th at the Irvine Improv.

OC Weekly (Ali Lerman): I am beyond excited you're coming out to Irvine again but seriously, when is the Anti-Social Network Tour coming to Southern Cali?

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Jim Norton: Thank you. It's hard because Artie Lange and Nick Di Paolo are doing their show five nights a week so they don't have a lot of time to get away. Our travel is limited. It's harder to do a West Coast gig because those guys would have to fly in the day of the show. It makes it a little harder for them but I'm sure we'll get out there eventually. We're doing Minnesota with those guys, Dave Attell, and Amy Schumer coming up soon.

Amy was just out here too, love her. I asked her if any of you guys ever hooked up but she said you guys are like brothers to her. Then she said she wouldn't put it past any of you guys to fuck your sisters.

[Laughs.] No we never even kissed! She opened for me for a little while and I never ever try to fuck women I work with on the road. I just don't do it because it's too uncomfortable for them. Like, it's hard enough being a stand-up without the meaty titted headliner trying to put his dick in you. They just want to do their set and go out to eat. We're just really good friends.

So as a huge fan of Opie & Anthony I must ask, any word on what's happening when the contract ends?

I think we're going to stay to be honest with you. We are "making progress" as they say. I don't know what that means because I don't get too many details because I don't want to get myself all irritated. I honestly don't know what to tell you but hopefully, we're going to stay. It's not guaranteed but I am hoping.

Me too! You do a lot of great characters on O&A that people love like "Chip" but on a side note, I hate "Edgar!"

Everyone hates Edgar and that's my goal. People love Chip but Chip is an idiot. He's kind of become this anti-hero because people are enjoying his awfulness. But I still like Chip to disappoint people. They think they're into Chip's rhythm and like, yay Chip's going to give another bad joke, and then he just gives a joke that genuinely annoys them because it's so awful. That feels really great. Colin Quinn loves Chip but it makes his stomach hurt on how bad Chip is. That makes me really happy.

Does it drive you crazy when you're doing stand-up and someone yells out character requests?

It depends on when they do it. I never like it when anyone interrupts a bit because it's all about the timing and it messes you up in a way that they don't understand. It's hard because you know they're just trying to have fun and not trying to be dicks because a lot of times they love me. Someone who's trying to be disruptive and an asshole I can just attack. When they're trying to have fun it becomes a little bit harder because you don't want to humiliate them so it's a fine line to walk. But yes, it can be irritating at times.

Regarding your sleep issues and your apnea mask, it's very umm...sexy. How does that affect your life in the bedroom?

Yeah, the pussy dryer-upper. That's what it's called. I haven't been wearing it at all because to be honest with you, the CPAP is not the right mask. I need a BiPAP so I'm in the process of getting a new one. Right now I'm wearing a mouth guard and I haven't been getting laid a lot but I'm sure I'll be wearing the mask again. The mask is certainly a turn off but honestly, I don't care if they like the mask or not. If they can deal with the herpes they can deal with the mask. [Laughs.] I wouldn't put it on when I'm about to fuck but I don't care about stuff like that. If they can tolerate me nude nothing else is going to matter.

What if they actually want you to wear it? I mean, I've seen some sexy suggestions regarding it on-line.

I'd be happy to! I'd be happy to bang somebody in that, it'd probably be a step up. Women occasionally find what I do attractive but my act is so aggressive that it's only sexy to a small segment. It's never going to get a lot of women really happy because you know, it's gross, I'm a pervert, and it's just not necessarily what gets girls to blow you after your shows. Unfortunately.

 

So how did you end up hooking up with Epix for your newest TV special?

They're actually a really good channel because they're using real comedians. They have used so many good comics I was like, yeah I'll work with you! It was one of the best creative experiences I've ever had, they're amazing. It goes on Comedy Central in February so I have to re-edit it to make it shorter because Comedy Central has commercials. I'm not really looking forward to re-editing it, I've seen it so many times.

I have that special on my DVR and when the neighborhood kids get loud outside my house, I open my door and put it on blast. Teach them a few new words...

[Laughs.] Yayyyy! I'd like to go out there and give em' a spankin'! (Uncle Paul voice) I want to do Uncle Paul on Louie's show badly! Louie likes Uncle Paul and he's actually a guy who is crazy enough to do it and make sense out of it. I don't know, that's just me saying it. Louie has not indicated that he'd want to do it but I'm just hoping. There is weird stuff with pedophile shit though. You gotta be careful but I think that he could write something really funny.

Good ol' pervy Uncle Paul. Yikes. Are you going to be doing material from your special in Irvine or are you working out some new stuff?

This is my first road gig after my special as far as a headliner gig so it's going to be almost all new material. I'm working on a new act so it might be a little disjointed here and there but I am not just doing material from my special. I think it will turn out fine.

Check out Jim Norton on Opie & Anthony on Sirius/XM, follow him on Twitter @JimNorton and check out his website www.EatABullet.com to find out what he's up to and to pick up some schwag. Get your tickets now to see Jim at the Irvine Improv this Thursday through Saturday (9/13-9/15) by going to www.improv.com or by calling 949-854-5455. The Improv is located at 71 Fortune Drive Irvine, CA 92618.

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