The Orange County Interwebs Horror Show

Today begins what will hopefully become a weekly Monday feature, although that may depend on if there is enough content to make that happen. Otherwise, it will go up when there are enough items to make it so. What am I yammering on and on about? The Orange County Interwebs Horror Show, a collection of stuff found online about or created in our promised land.

Let's start the show, shall we?
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Illustration by Jay Brockman

The Spokes Set Has Spoken As Mox just reported, Orange County Great Park PR flack Craig Reem gave Register columnist David Whiting the cold shoulder when the journo sought an interview with the public works project''s CEO. Seems Whiting has also fallen out of favor with bicyclists, who aren't taking kindly to his writing “cyclists need to clean up their act” and when “packs block streets, they scare the bejeebers out of drivers.” Cyclelicious appreciates Whiting championing road safety but he or she believes the columnist's focus is off track. Accident data from OC shows motorists cause more accidents with bikes than the other way around, notes Cyclelicious, adding, “I'm sure the monster truck driver was terrified of the little 9-year-old he crushed on the road.” (Cyclelicious)

Achtung, Baby! Elise asks: “Is it true Huntington Beach has a lot of neo Nazis?” Of the five who provide answers, Castilla y Leon puts it best: “Sadly, yes. But no one cares about them. They are simply ignored. (Yahoo! Answers)

Know What's Scarier Than Skinheads in Surf City? UFO activity! (MetaCafe)

Paging PETA “Your child will have a blast,” promise organizers of Silver Gan Isreal Day Camp in Huntington Beach, which despite Surf City's skinhead rep is billed as a “safe Jewish place for Jewish kids.” Campers enjoy cyberlab, laser tag and two swimming pools. But one promised activity may alarm the animal rights set: “hamster balling.” (CampCoupons.com)

Run for the Border Back before they knew any better, Newport Beach cops dispatched over the radio the code “NIN,” which stood not for Trent Reznor's band but “nigger in Newport.” The belief was an African-American in the upscale community could not possibly be up to any good–so be on the lookout. That's a code of the past in these more enlightened times (uh, right fellas?), but Antonio “Mexican Samurai” G. makes one wonder if NIN has been replaced with MIN these days. Drawing hard looks in Newport Beach prompted Antonio to comment, “I'm going to get arrested. In the eyes of Newport Beach, I look like a Raiders fan.” Baback “Your REALTOR” D. advises, “Don't forget to wash the Republican off of you when you get back home.” (Yelp)

Brain Salad Surgery People with ENFP brain types are highly energetic, enthusiastic, charming, imaginative and improvisational. They can usually can do anything they set their minds to. Whitney Houston, Diana Ross, Reba McEntire, Amy Grant and Ricky Skaggs are ENFP's. So is USC and Mater Dei High School star quarterback-turned-potential NFL bust Matt Leinart, according to Josh Galt, who notes that brain type may not be the best for pro football glory. “He basically threw a hissy fit when he got benched, and got himself traded to the Texans. He stated the reasons were 'outside of football,' i.e. something mano-a-mano with the coach. _NF_'s have this thing about holding on to personal insults. And getting their feelings hurt easily. Grow up a bit, Matt, you're supposed to be a leader of men! That's not the way to do it. Gotta be tough, mentally and emotionally.” (Athlete Brain Types)

Skinned Alive On the opposite end of the QB assessment brain pool is the Ebonics-prone poster who rated Colt Brennan before Leinart's Mater Dei backup was cut by the Washington Redskins: “I'm sick of people sayin dat Colt Brennan is a better QB den McNabb, it's just ridiculous, he aint even better den Grossman. He had a chance 2 sho dem up in offseason workouts dis summer, but he didn't, in fact he couldn't compete wit dat noname guy Richard Bartell. Everybody sayin we should have gave em a chance, we did we drafted em, gave em a roster spot, from there he had 2 earn his own he couldn't. Starting spots r earned not given, n he didn't earn da right 2 play 1st string so he should not have been given a chance. He had 1 good preseason n da rest well, he just couldn't cut it, u cant just hand ova da offense 2 sum1 like dat. N as far as Colt n Campbell, well who's got a starting job, n who's name probably wont get mentioned in football this year. Colt should try NFL Europe, da Canadian Leauge, or mabye even Arena Football, but da NFL, just aint 4 hi.” All dat's, I mean, that's missing are a few timely placed aiiiiiights. (Redskins Rule!)

Consider Yourselves Warned, Ladies PUA Forums is “the definitive forum for men,” that is, men who fancy themselves pick up artists. Here's one recent classified: “Looking for wingman in fullerton area. Just moved here 3 weeks ago and i know there HAS to be some PUAs in the area that can mentor, wing, and hang out with!” A wingman, as every beer commercial viewer knows, is a friend who helps another friend hook up with a lady by acting interested in the lady's less-hot friend. If you're unsure if you've got what it takes to be a wingman, worry not: PUA markets a wingman boot camp. Bet they have hamster balling. (PUAForums.com)

Seen something interesting about or from Orange County or an Orange Countian on the Interwebs? Email me the link: mc****@oc******.com.

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