DO realize that drinking from a brown paper bag makes you a primary target of the anti-booze beach patrol.
DON'T go to Laguna Beach if you're insecure about your own sexuality.
DO appreciate that the surf off Newport Beach sometimes offers swift, lethal currents that can incapacitate even experienced swimmers.
DON'T leave for the beach at noon and expect to find parking before dusk.
DO know that police fly helicopters at a height over the beach that allows them to see everything without you knowing they are there.
DON'T go to Huntington Beach if you're afraid of skinheads or eau de marijuana.
DO maintain a 100-yard safety zone from often-obnoxious Inland Empire beach visitors, more than a few of whom are on parole or high on meth.
DON'T act like a Midwesterner and believe that you are more powerful than a 6-foot wave.
DO vacate the ocean if you see self-described “Surfin' Congressman” Dana Rohrabacher appear with a Boogie board and his usual all-young-male entourage.
CNN-featured investigative reporter R. Scott Moxley has won Journalist of the Year honors at the Los Angeles Press Club; been named Distinguished Journalist of the Year by the LA Society of Professional Journalists; obtained one of the last exclusive prison interviews with Charles Manson disciple Susan Atkins; won inclusion in Jeffrey Toobin’s The Best American Crime Reporting for his coverage of a white supremacist’s senseless murder of a beloved Vietnamese refugee; launched multi-year probes that resulted in the FBI arrests and convictions of the top three ranking members of the Orange County Sheriff’s Department; and gained praise from New York Times Magazine writers for his “herculean job” exposing entrenched Southern California law enforcement corruption.