Because You're Ugly: Retainer Wear!

Remember that time in the fourth grade you left your retainer on your lunch tray, trashed everything on the tray... only to realize in fifth period that you threw your retainer away with that mac and cheese—and then subsequently spent the rest of the school day rifling through bags of trash for it?

No? Well, me neither. But this gold retainer necklace from none other than Fred Flare might remind you of your more awkward days way back when. This sterling silver necklace with 14kt plating sits on a 30" chain and is sure to start a few conversations—or maybe even a few jeers.

I'm filing this away in the "kinda gross, kinda cute, definitely interesting" folder, but maybe you'll dig it more than I do. The only drawback? It probably costs just as much as your real retainer did: $300.

The gold retainer necklace is available at


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