That Time Margaret Cho Bought a Cursed Antique Online.

It's a joke, it won't happen.
It's a joke, it won't happen.
Todd V. Wolfson

Everyone loves options and if you also love comedy and are a fan of Margaret Cho, the upcoming options to see her are aplenty. This Friday on Showtime, her new special "psyCHO" is premiering, in November she'll be popping into The Wiltern, and just recently, she's been spotted on E!'s Fashion Police which will hopefully become a bit more full-time. (hint-hint) In honor of one of our favorite gals doing the most, we hit her gorgeously witty mind with some question insanity. And she in turn rewarded us with clever answers that left us laughing and learning.

OC Weekly (Ali Lerman): So I was thinking about how you've become a role model for so many people and was wondering, who are your role models?

Margaret Cho: I love so many people. I love Joan Rivers, Robin Williams...I love so many people in music, comedy, and art. And I'm a big fan of all of these things too.

Speaking of roles, do you ever role play during sex? I have! But then I always forget who I'm supposed to be. [Laughs.] I lose the thought at some point and I do everything wrong.

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Hilarious. What is your favorite word? Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!

Mine too. Also, it's one of my favorite verbs. Yeah! It's a lot of things! It's a noun, it's a verb, and it's an adjective. I love it. It's a lot.

A lot of fun! If you could make one thing illegal, what would you pick? Ohhh, I wonder! Let's see, I guess fat shaming.

Can you imagine how many people would be in jail? I know! [Laughs.] Wouldn't it be great though?

It'd be insane for sure! If you had to send one person to hell, who would it be? Donald Trump.

If that really happens, I'm leaving the country. It's not going to happen! It's a joke, it won't happen. He can't, there's no way. We're not that stupid.

It's terrifying though because the more time the press spends on him, the less we see of the serious candidates. Right! It's also a smokescreen because they're trying to divert the attention that republicans are trying to defund Planned Parenthood and that is the most evil and disturbing thing that could possibly happen. It's really scary.

Yes, I live for any man making decisions for my body. OK so when was the moment that you knew you were funny enough to make it as a comic? I didn't really have that moment, I just knew that was my job. I didn't have a sense of "can I do this?" I just knew that when I saw it in action, I realized, that's what I do. It was a weirdly easy thing and it wasn't so much of a decision as it was an acknowledgement. I just knew that this would be my work.

I love that because I totally get it. When I first watched stand-up I thought, I have to write about it someday. Yeah! You get that "oh, that's right" feeling where it just kind of clicks. For me I felt like an outsider but then I found comedy and I was just like, oh, OK. I'm actually going to be inside of this.

Well I'm grateful because you've personally brought me many laughs. Are you on Tinder? No! I don't even know how to do that! What is that? Is it like a dating site right? I have no idea.

Well I'm not on it but it seems like a fuckboi site of sorts. It's like, who's near me that wants to get it on? OK that's good but yeah, I don't know because I've never seen it. I know nothing about it.

You're probably not missing out. What's under your bed? Probably an iPad, there's also this anti-allergy machine blowing on me at all times and there's probably a dog or two.

Alright. What's something that you can't live without? And don't say food. Intelligent company. Intelligent company is what I thrive on.

That's such a good answer because most people would say "my phone." What's the most bizarre thing you've ever bought on-line? Oh, I bought a dredging hook from the 1800's. It was used to find bodies in a lake. I have a lot of very strange medical antiques and that one was only ten dollars. It was a "buy it now" thing and it came too quickly. Like, it came the next morning. And then there was this coldness to it that disturbed me. It was ice-cold in a warm room. There was something about the energy that really bothered me and I think a lot of misery came with it. I mean, when you're dredging the lake for a body, people are upset. So, I took it and gave it to a friend who was opening a business and is a purveyor of oddity. As soon as I gave it to him, he broke his leg in many places and then his business was shut down. I'm not sure about the history of where it is now but I'm glad it's no longer in my possession.

Holy shit that's crazy! On a side note, I can think of a few people I'd like to gift that to if you can track it down. Wow. Well other than gifting bad luck dredging hooks, what do you think is your biggest strength? I'm compassionate and that compassion is involved in everything I do. And that compassion takes me a long way.

OK last one up. Hit me with the best advice that you've ever been given. Joan Rivers told me, "You're always going to be great, you're always going to work, you're always going to be funny, and they will want you forever. Never worry." I miss her.

Be sure to tune in for psyCHO this Friday (September 25th) on Showtime, grab your tickets now to see Margaret at The Wiltern on November 14th on www.LiveNation.com, and for everything Cho, check out her website www.MargaretCho.com and follow her on Twitter @MargaretCho.

Follow us on Twitter @OCWeeklyMusic and like us on Facebook at Heard Mentality and follow the author on Twitter @AliNotAlli.


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