Courtney Love caused a teeny stir this week when she raved about the hallucinogenic tea Ayahuasca. Sounding like a frat boy detailing his first blunt, Love shared some of the urban legends surrounding Ayahuasca, namely, that users experience identical visions of a mysterious "Black guy" (Editor ... More >>
For the last few months, a kooky religious group has been plastering North America with billboards and placards announcing that the world will end on May 21.
Call us warped, but we're thrilled by the prospect of Armageddon. With millions of the faithful lifted skyward by the Rapture, their hom ... More >>
As you well know, Clockwork has declared Steven Seagal Lawman "the Greatest, Best TV Show God Ever Gave Man" and blogged incessantly about the A&E reality show.When we discovered filming of the show had been suspended because of a sexual harassment allegation against the burly martial arts ma ... More >>
On over the weekend, Angels third baseman Brandon Wood hit a grand slam in the bottom of the eighth inning against the Colorado Rockies at Angel Stadium of Anaheim.While that's pretty impressive, the four runs Wood drove in over the weekend represent 30 percent of his RBIs on the season. In other ... More >>
As close readers know, Clockwork is a huuuuuuuge fan of Steven
Seagal Lawman. Sadly, the A&E reality series has shut down due to silly
allegations of sexual harassment, illegal trafficking of females for sex,
failure to prevent sexual harassment, retaliation, wrongful termination in
violation ... More >>
"You know, being a lifelong practitioner of the martial arts, I try to
teach everyone not to fight the recoil of the weapon but more to become
one with the weapon and let it be an extension of their body."
lawman, in voice over for scenes showing him teaching a fellow portly
res ... More >>
"Criminals usually prey on
weakness. They can smell it. Those of us who have studied the martial
arts as long as I have, we can usually see those kind of predators."
lawman, explaining what he sees from a crowd of young men moving toward a police
car holding a young man the group ... More >>
"When I was in Asia, you know, I learned to relax with the martial arts and meditation. Over here, people relax by drinking. And we're okay with that as long as nobody gets hurt."--Steven Seagal, lawman, preparing for a rowdy Friday night patrolling outside Parish County, Louisiana, bars. Steven ... More >>
"I've known Sacky Chan for 40 years."--Steven Seagal, lawman, to a tipsy suspect who asked through a heavy slur, "Hey, can you beat . . . Sacky Chan?" Steven Seagal Lawman airs at 10 p.m. Wednesdays on A&E.
NOTE--Clockwork would like to sincerely apologize for forgetting to post a Steven Seagal Lawman Quote of the Week yesterday. As if suffering from a swift akido kick to the head, I totally forgot to post one. To hopefully make amends, here are two quotes."These are the 'jects, you know, the projec ... More >>
After a deputy in another Parish County, La., sheriff's cruiser gives the exact location of a possible home burglary:"Lose
this siren as soon as we get close so he don't hear us coming. [To cameraman
riding in the back seat of his unmarked SUV:] We've got a burglary-in-progress and we're right th ... More >>
Best quote of the week from Steven Seagal Lawman, 8 p.m. Wednesdays on A&E:"You don't have to be like this, ya'all. You know what I'm sayin'? It could
be easy. And watch who you hangin' out with. Think about it, hear? Bye, mama.
Don't whup 'em too hard when you get home."-Steven Seagal, lawma ... More >>
Steven Seagal Lawman--the A&E reality show that premiered last night starring the Mansier model, fading action movie star and Orange County Sheriff's Department reserve deputy reject--is the greatest, best television programming God ever gave man.Here's why . . .
Slate follows up on word that Barack Obama wore bullet-proof clothing during his inauguration by noting that a Colombian company, Miguel Caballero, makes bullet-resistant leather jackets, polo
shirts, windbreakers and ruffled tuxedo shirts, which range from a few
hundred dollars to $7,000 in price. ... More >>