Top Five Things Disney Should Sue Over
Disney recently approved an exact replica (or at least as exact as you can get when your source material is a cartoon) of Carl Fredricksen's quaint helium balloon-powered home in Up.
But how could this be? Are we talking about the same Disney here? The same company who once forced a Florida day care center to remove a Minnie Mouse mural from its walls? The same Disney who told a stonemason that his carving of Winnie the Pooh on the gravestone of a dead child was a violation of their copyright? It can't be, right? It is.
Learn more about Disney's nod of approval for the house after the jump, then read on and learn what top five things Disney should be suing people over.
It might seem amazing, but Disney not only allowed the building of an official "Up" house in a Salt Lake City suburb, but they went so far as to approve it, with a nod of support even coming from the director of the film himself, Pete Docter.
The house--which was the brainchild of a Salt Lake City, Utah home designer Blair Bangerter of Bangerter Homes--is currently on the market for $400,000. Man, I loved that movie, but I don't know if I $400,000 loved it.
Regardless, if you're interested in owning some Disney-approved property in Utah (not sure why you would, but to each their own) learn more about the house and see a photo slideshow here.
The fact that Disney gave their blessing for not only the building but also the selling of this house is admittedly pretty shocking. Disney is notorious for being hyper-controlling of their image, so much so that they often pick fights with day care centers and stonemasons. But why go after those people when there are a whole slew of people who deserve to get their balls sued off by the Mouse.
Check out our list of the top five folks Disney should be serving papers to.
5. Disney Theme Park Visitors
Paying customers are a direct reflection of the company they frequent. Don't believe me? Just look at People of Walmart. When it comes to Disney's theme park goers, they just might be able to sue for defamation of image. Of course, I'm not talking about all of them, but I think we've all seen our fair share of people in the park who shouldn't be A) wearing clothes three sizes too small for their body, B) screaming at their children as if they had just murdered Minnie Mouse herself, and C) carting around four turkey legs in a rented stroller. No shit, I saw that once. If you have to rent a wheeled transportation device to carry your food around for you, you really should be mentally evaluated.
4. Shitty Foreign Rip-Off Films
Why pay premium price for a Blu-ray of Disney's 1991 Best Picture nominee "Beauty and the Beast" when you can pay $2 for the Thai shot-for-shot rip-off that GM Toons released a few years back? Sure, the animation is terrible and the voice talent is laughable, but what do you expect for two bucks? And besides, your daughter won't know the difference... as long as your daughter is Helen Keller. If you're interested in picking up a few more of GM Toons' "homages" to Disney's animated classics, look them up on Google. You won't find them, of course, because they never even really existed. GM Toons is the Keyser Söze of animation. Of course, Disney is notorious for "borrowing" story ideas from other countries (check out these amazing "The Lion King"/"Kimba the White Lion" parallels), so maybe it's just a matter of payback being a bitch.
3. The Idiot in Charge of the Disney Vault
Whoever came up with the idea of the exclusivity that comes from hoarding Disney films in the Disney Vault should be sued for idiocy. I can't believe that Disney makes more money by enforcing a moratorium on their films, especially when they decide to cut entire titles out of their catalog. (Again, for the millionth time, anyone remember "The Song of the South"?) Netflix and VOD are strangling the life out of physical copy sales, and Disney should rip the door off the vault and make everything they own available to anyone who wants it, because twenty years from now kids aren't even going to know what a DVD is. Except the hipster kids who will still buy them for nostalgia, just like vinyl.
Long before the Disney Shanghai Resort (which is slated to open in 2016) was even Imagineered (not sure if that's an official Disney word, but I did it anyway so don't sue me), China decided to beat them to the punch and open the Shijingshan Amusement Park in Beijing. And let me tell you, folks, it's exactly like a Disney theme park! They have a castle just like Sleeping Beauty Castle, and a globe-like building that looks just like Spaceship Earth in Epcot. And all the characters are there, too! Donald Duck! Minnie Mouse! They even have Shrek, Hello Kitty, Bugs Bunny and a whole slew of other cheap versions of trademarked characters they stole outright. How are they able to do this? They're China! They're gonna own America in about four years anyway, so why not "borrow" them little bits of our pop culture until then?
1. The Dipshit Who Got This Tattoo
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