The Really - Really - Really - Real - This - Time - We - Mean - It OC Recap

Wow. So much happened on Newport Harbor last night. Its getting hard to keep up with all of the drama and refrain from vomiting all over the front of myself. So here we go again with the monotony and stupidity of this fucking show.

Episode three begins with a bang. Chase breaks up with Taylor because he is "getting tired of always having to check in" and "tired of this girlfriend stuff." Taylor doesn't seem fazed by this in the least and goes with the flow with no argument. Perhaps that's because she knows Chase is a huge douche bag.

Anyway, it comes out that apparently this guy Chase has a bitter enemy named Grant and Grant is best friends with Clay. So Clay talks Grant into asking Taylor out since she just broke up with Chase. Grant complies.

Here is how Grant asks Taylor out:

"What up Tay Tay?" he asks. "Nothing," she answers. "I was thinking about getting dinner." "What time?" "Seven." "OK. See ya."

It's almost poetic. Almost.

Anyway, they end up going out and are all over each other. Grant's shirt is unbuttoned a bit too far and he looks kinda gay but whatevs, Taylor seems to dig it.

So the date is underway and Grant and Taylor are having some inane conversation that is less talking and more making sounds with their mouths, when Chase calls Taylor's phone but she doesn't answer. WTF? Chase decides not to take that shit lying down so he goes to the next best thing, Chrissy.

Poor stupid Chrissy totally invites Chase over to her house and they totally make out.

You got that right? They make out. At Chrissy's house. Right on Chrissy's dad's territory. I guess all of that checking in doesn't really help anything after all, as Chrissy is still acting like a ho bag.

The next night Grant throws some poker party "for the boys" but of course Chrissy has to show up because she wants to see Clay. But uh oh, what's this? Clay won't pay attention to her! Apparently he knows about the makeout session between her and Chase. Poor Chrissy. I guess Clay isn't in the market for a ho bag. Get used to it sister!

The next day, Chase decides to have a talk with Taylor in the car because that is where all couples go to have meaningful conversations. He claims that she betrayed him because she went out with Grant who is his sworn enemy. Taylor is all like, "Tough shit, Chase," and that's really the end of that.

So the gossip of this illustrious Chrissy-Chase hook-up travels all the way down to Allie (who used to go out with Chase way back in the day) and Allie's friend who doesn't matter. These two bimbos are chatting away about the hookup when Allie says, "Chrissy can have Chase as long as I can have Clay." OHHHHH. Trouble is a brewing! You can just smell it.

And it smells shitty. Just like this show.


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