The Foreskin: An Appreciation

While a good-quality product is a good-quality product no matter how it's packaged, it is a definite bonus when an unfamiliar penis reveals itself to be shrouded in a skin afghan. The controversial foreskin is perhaps the only real wild card in the first venereal meet-up with a new male partner, perhaps analogous to the discovery of fake breasts, but with a frisson of excitement accompanying the reveal as opposed to one of horror.

The foreskin is an oft-overlooked component of the male body, likely because only about half of the men in the U.S. can lay claim to one. What some call "maintaining corporeal integrity," an intact cock canopy possesses a natural, earthy and vaguely Euro vibe. It's a relaxed look. It's the hoodie and jeans of the genital world. It's the Mountain Man version of Brad Pitt (remember, the scruffy beard with beads strung through it?), which was infinitely sexier than the mega-groomed Preppy Asshole version of Brad Pitt.

Such a skin wrapper holds its own rewards (heh, like a penis). No need for lube! Moist dicks keep vaginas happy! Evidently, more pleasure to be had for both (or all, one supposes) parties! This happy, ridged strip of skin has a thousand or so nerve endings, all of which are as spasmatic and eager to be pleased as a gymnasium full of post-juice-and-cookies kindergarteners. And not to forget, "foreskin" loosely translated means "more penis." How could that possibly be bad?

Sure, some misguided souls will state a preference for the supposed aesthetic value of the shorn wang. However, anyone with this sort of puritanical and curmudgeonly attitude likely doesn't have much of a rah-rah-go-team-can-do sexual ethos. Read: these people do not give good head and would probably rather be sucking on a dry popsicle stick than a penis. Likewise, the "cleanliness" argument is of no consequence here because the idiot who can't keep his dick clean due to an extra fold of skin doesn't have any business sharing a bed with anyone other than his Cozy Bear.

When it comes down to it, at the moment of truth, the circed and the non-circed look pretty much the same. In all its incarnations, the penis is, without a doubt, a fascinating tool. But it is the luxuriants and connoisseurs among us, the bon vivants, who embrace this part of a man and revel in its quirky beauty. Because when you're talking dick, a turtleneck never goes out of style.

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