That's Classified

I get everything on Craigslist. My digital SLR, drag-queen house mate and 49-year-old boyfriend. My sister's Koreatown apartment. A stint editing this Russian chick's e-book. And then there was that graveyard-shift cop-beat job with City News Service.

The OC online classifieds are a weirdo haunt, and we'll brave the waters a couple of times a week so you don't have to.

Today's finds:

Dom in a wheelchair: "I have experience with spanking, flogging, gags, canes, crops, bondage, butt plugs . . . Cerebral palsy cannot be transmitted. I like to do things that I can do by myself. It is just a few things that I need help with. You will help me when I need help . . . "

Pick up our Plecostomus: Big fish needs a home.

Baby-making machine wanted: He's "looking forward to seeing whose out here especially if your BIOLOGOCAL CLOCK IS CLICKIN TOO!"

Pigs in demand: "Are you a hung Raunch Top? An uninhibited Pig Bottom? Isatiable cum-guzzler? Then we wanna talk to you!"

I want to wear you: Clothe the comedian, please.

Free rent . . . with strings attached: "Free rent for a single female in a nice, clean house in a good neighborhood. offering free rent for minimum light chores, companionship, and friendship. i am an attractive, nice, clean, honest male. if things work out, i am open to eventually possibly a dating relationship and possibly marriage in the future . . . "


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