Every Monday, adult superstar/OC girl Tasha Reign gives us her thoughts on life, sex, politics and everything in between. Today, Tasha weighs in on what women REALLY want. Enjoy!
Men always ask me what women want--in bed, in life, and how to "get" them or please them. I think I'm a good source to ask, seeing as that I love women and men and am pretty in tune with myself (a woman) on many levels. Every girl is different, of course, so take my insight with a grain of salt, but I've been around long enough to know that the majority of women will feel like me on the important things.
When I look for a man, I'm always attracted by their confidence and ability to pursue me without seeming too forward and creepy. I like a man who can take control in more ways than one and show me that he's direct and knows what he wants. I want a man to show me who's boss--that's to say, I'm so strong and independent that I want a guy who can respect me but will be able to play the role of boyfriend and not force me to be in charge, like I am so much of the time. When 50 Shades of Grey came out, I knew it was going to be controversial, but I couldn't believe an author had the ability to identify exactly what the general population of women want, what their sexual desires are, and how they imagine a perfect and idealized man.
Back to what women want: after that initial attraction, women want to feel special and targeted, not just someone you happen to stumble across. Most would like you to make the moves on her and be the aggressor, but at the same time act like you have a lot going on--that you're busy and that it's important to get to know her as a person and not just a hot piece of ass. Making sure you're confident and that you appear active and driven are as important as pursuing her and making sure she knows you're thinking about her through text and phone calls. I never take a man seriously who only texts--even if I plan on making him a casual hookup partner, I want them to put in some effort and show that they didn't just text me to bang it out. If you're going after an in-demand girl then you need to stand out from the crowd. Think of it as online dating--you are not going to send out some silly mass message if you're actually interested in the girl and want her to respond accordingly, are you?
Gender roles: my favorite topic. I have so much fun with this because they're ultimately superficial and not the reason you love someone. I know other women feel this way as well, and it sounds less progressive than we as a society are used to, but it's human nature and basic animal instinct. Women want a man who is going to make sure their emotional, intellectual, financial, and moral needs are met. Most women want a man who is a breadwinner, a man who is going to be the "hunter," so to speak. If men understand this basic principle, they're off to a good start.
But this is something that can be difficult to understand or talk about because we as females want equality and equal opportunity in many parts of life. There is something sacred and specific about a relationship between a man a women and how that reflects what we as women want--and I don't just mean finances and financially caring for your girl but you want to be able to do the "manly" stuff for her: the handy work, the sex, the barbecuing, the masculine activities that makes our panties wet.
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SHOW ME HOW
When I'm in a relationship, I love giving myself fully in the bedroom. I'll attempt to bake or at least pick up food and pretend I cooked it. I'll look beautiful and dress up for my man. In turn, us women want appreciation. We want the compliments, and we want the acknowledgement of all of our efforts to please and cater to you. Attention is what women want--it sounds so simple.
Oh, yeah: SEX!!! What do women want in the bedroom? What do you want in the bedroom? GOOD SEX! But that's another column...in the meanwhile, guys: read, and learn!
Follow Tasha Reign on Twitter @tashareign