Proof of Barack Obama's Hawaiian Birth Is Found! Is NOT! Is TOO!

From the Department of Nothing Important Will Ever Get Done in This Country Because All Sides Cannot Agree on the Facts comes the latest word from Hawaii's new Governor

Neil Abercrombie

on President

Barack Obama

's birth in the Aloha State. Those who discount

Orly Taitz

and fellow birthers as nuts, partisans or partisan nuts trumpet Abercrombie's revelation that documents have been unearthed indicating Obama was indeed born in Hawaii in 1961 after the Islands had become a state, thus making Barry eligible to be Commander in Chief. But the birthers, who claim Obama was born in Kenya--no, Indonesia; Wait, the United Kingdom!--herald the same Abercrombie disclosure as proof the fictional birth certificate is "missing." 'Cause it ain't never been there.

Dunt-dun-dunnnn . . .


International Man of Mystery
International Man of Mystery
International Man of Mystery

Abercrombie, who took office in December, told Honolulu's


that "our investigation" indicates there is a recording of his birth, adding, "It actually exists in the archives, written down."

Comments under a New York Daily News piece on Abercrombie's find:

"Oh I see. . . . The long form with his little footprint, and the doctors' signatures who tended his mother 'may' not be in the archives? And liberals want to know why this issue never goes away?"

Many comments left under the online version of the Star-Advertiser story are like this:

"In Hawaii, a Certification of Live Birth was used to register babies who were born out of the state. According to Obama's family and many others in Kenya, he was born there. Also neither parent has any record of attending any schools or other places 6 months before the birth. Where were they?"

See, unless Abercrombie can produce an actual long-form, official birth-certificate document that has been signed and stamped, with I's crossed and T's dotted--one that can be turned over to birthers for carbon-dating tests that must prove ink met paper in late summer 1961--then his saying such proof exists in the archives is bullshit to the batshit-crazy crowd.

And even if Abercrombie does produce such a document for the whole world to see, the nutbars will want some other documentation, like records of the schools and other places Obama's parents attended six months before he was born (!?!).

Even that would not matter because the birthers will then contend Obama is not eligible to be president because he was born to a non-natural-born, U.S.-citizen father, your U.S. Constitution funny papers be damned.

Abercrombie, 72, tells the Hawaiian paper his crusade against the birthers is personal.

"It's a matter of principle with me," he reportedly said. "I knew his mom and dad. I was here when he was born. Anybody who wants to ask a question honestly could have had their answer already."


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