I read more about Scientology than normal people should, only because I'm a bit obsessed about religions, pseudo-religions, and their secrets. So when the followers of L. Ron Hubbard bought a historic SanTana building a couple of years ago, I figured they were about to launch a massive outreach effort to wean Orange Countians away from the Jesus juice and toward the Clear.
Four years later, however, the Church of Scientology of Orange County doesn't even have a functioning website (unless those pesky Anonymous protesters are back to their dirty tricks, in their ever-lasting homage to LRH). Their main proselytizers seem to be older gents who set up tables outside Norm's. And their latest effort is downright amateur.
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Behold a postcard mailed this week to homes across la naranja. If it wasn't for the name, a novice would probably mistake the postcard, with itsScientology symbols, as a missing page from a rip-off of The Da Vinci Code. And “Make the Difference: Join the Team”? Does Scientology want to save people's souls, or get them ready for an Irvine corporate-yard job?
The back of the card produces further confusion:
What's with the Vitruvian Man knock-off in the lettering? “Org” staff? As in joining a non-profit? “Clearing this planet”? Of what–brush? Mustard flowers? Oil?
I know what Scientologists are selling, and I'm not buying it–however, I sympathize with them, since their Hollywood ambassadors are bringing ridicule to them left (Cruise) and right (Travolta). So, take a suggestion from us Christians, and be a bit more upfront about what voodoo you hawk before trying outreach again. Might I suggest illustrated comics ala the greatest evangelizer of all time: Jack Chick? Would LOVE to see Xenu in the printed page…
