Monday's Headlines & Surprises

  • Democrats flip-flop on SoCal bribery case report: Greg Miller at the Los Angeles Times says an internal investigations report by the House Intelligence Committee continues to remain off-limits to the public. The politicians don't want the masses to see even a declassified summary report on the embarrassing activities of disgraced Representative Randy “Duke” Cunningham. When the Republicans ran the House, the Dems screamed bloody murder that the report should be released. They changed their minds when they took control this year Nevertheless, Miller's got some great detail about Cunningham's slim. The congressman--a Bible-thumping know-it-all ex-soldier--is currently serving an eight-year prison sentence for his grotesque bribery and tax-evasion schemes involving national security projects.
  • Getting out of Dodge: Money magazine's August cover story reports on the “Best Places to Live,” and Newport Beach isn't included. In fact, the magazine includes one couple--ex-OC attorney Jason Annigian, 32, and his wife, Katharine, 28--who fled the beach city last October. They are elated to now live in Claremont, population 35,900. The couple sold their small Newport Beach condo for more than they paid for their new 2,200-square-foot home. But can they say they really don't miss daily traffic jams on the 55? 405? 5? And PCH?
  • Some bus drivers bitch about new deal: Katherine Nguyen at the Register says that Patrick D. Kelly, secretary-treasurer for Local 952, is elated with the deal he negotiated this weekend that means full bus service by the middle of the week. “We squeezed this for everything we could get,” said Kelly. “I believe in this contract.” But Nguyen found bus drivers mumbling. Jacob Houser told the reporter that “I've been striking the whole week and for what? A $2.50 raise over three years? Not worth it.” It's anticipated that Houser's sentiment, even if shared by others, won't win the day. Ratification of the new pact--which allegedly won't mean higher fares--is expected this morning after Orange County Transportation officials meet behind closed doors.
  • Jessica Simpson shares body secrets. Again: Harper's Bazaar and the National Enquirer, source for most of cable news nowadays, report that the Dukes of Hazzard actress “wants to make sure everyone knows she is plastic surgery-free!” Oh, I can finally exhale. But Simpson says she's not against the procedure. “If my boobs dropped down to my belly button, I would get them lifted,” she said. Later, Simpson complained that she suffers “white-girl syndrome”--a flat ass. “I have to do as many squats as I can to get a little booty.” Funny, that's what Schwarzengger used to say.
  • Road rules: Can somebody please tell drivers in Santa Ana that they cannot go from a left-turn lane and immediately cross three lanes to turn right?
  • A cigar-chomping Mickadeit meets a drag queen and likes it: Unlike that Dillow guy, Frank Mickadeit is a Reg columnist without fear (or mental defects). My evidence? Mickadeit tells us this morning that he recently attended a drag-queen tupperware party in Newport Beach. We learn his thoughts on the experience: “Strangely, I start to seriously consider items like the Flat-Out Containers ($15-$57, assorted colors).” The Mick was so impressed that he ponders selling the wares to “make an extra $60,000 a year” for his old VW bus and premium Cohibas. In drag? Please, no.
  • Honor these names: The Department of Defense says it could approve another Iraq troop surge if President George W. Bush decides it's necessary. Bush--who frequently proclaims, "I am the decider"--says there could be another troop surge only if the Pentagon wants one. Go figure. Meanwhile, last Friday, the Department of Defense updated the Iraq War killed-in-action list to include 3,610 U.S. solidiers.

    Here are the names of those KIA soldiers from the Orange County area:

    Army Staff Sgt. Stephen A. Bertolino, Orange. Army Sgt. 1st Class Kelly Bolor, Whittier. Army Pfc. Joel K. Brattain, Santa Ana. Army Pvt. Michael P. Bridges, Placentia. Navy Seaman Pablito Pena Briones Jr., Anaheim. Army Pfc. Stephen A. Castellano, Long Beach. Marine Lance Cpl. Manuel A. Ceniceros, Santa Ana. Army Chief Warrant Officer Cornell C. Chao, Orange. Army Sgt. 1st Class Randy D. Collins, Long Beach. Marine Maj. Ricardo A. Crocker, Mission Viejo. Army Spc. Edgar P. Daclan Jr., Cypress. Army 2nd Lt. Mark J. Daily, Irvine. Army Sgt. Anthony J. Davis Jr., Long Beach. Marine Lance Cpl. Derek L. Gardner, San Juan Capistrano. Marine Cpl. Jose A. Garibay, Costa Mesa. Marine Staff Sgt. William M. Harrell, Placentia. Army Pfc. Raymond L. Henry, Anaheim. Marine Pfc. Sean Horn, Orange. Marine Cpl. William C. James, Huntington Beach. Army Pfc. Jang H. Kim, Placentia. Army Sgt. Shin W. Kim, Fullerton. Pfc. Samuel S. Lee, Anaheim. Marine Lance Cpl. Hugo R. Lopezlopez, La Habra. Army Pfc. Lyndon A. Marcus Jr., Long Beach. Marine Cpl. Antonio Mendoza, Santa Ana. Army Sgt. Eliu A. Miersandoval, San Clemente. Navy Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael A. Monsoor, Garden Grove. Army Spc. Justin W. Pollard, Foothill Ranch. Marine Lance Cpl. Michael S. Probst, Irvine. Marine Lance Cpl. Rafael Reynosasuarez, Santa Ana. Army Staff Sgt. Victor A. Rosales, Westminster. Army Spc. Roberto L. Martinez Salazar, Long Beach. Marine Lance Cpl. Daniel J. Santee, Mission Viejo. Marine 1st Sgt. Edward Smith, Anaheim. Army Maj. Charles R. Soltes, Jr., Irvine. Army Pvt. Shane M. Stinson, Fullerton. Army Spc. Astor A. Sunsin-Pineda, Long Beach. Navy Lt. Cmdr Keith E. Taylor, Irvine. Army Pfc. David T. Toomalatai, Long Beach. Marine Pfc. George D. Torres, Long Beach. Army Spc. Quoc Binh Tran, Mission Viejo.


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