I'm not even going to attempt to introduce the two-day film festival starting this evening when organizers have done so well on their own:
We know you're used to the finer things in life, Orange County, California: the beautiful weather, the bodacious babes, the glitz and glamour. Well, there's a horror fest on the horizon that is going to strip away all the beauty that is Orange County and bring a little darkness to the area. Say hello to the Everybody Dies Horror Film Festival.
Held at Brea Plaza Five Cinemas on Associated Road through Saturday, the Everybody Dies Horror Film Festival promises to pack in "two days of debauchery" in the form of short and feature-length films.
Are there titles like An Evening With My Comatose Mother, Zombies and Assholes and Dahmer vs. Gacy? Of course there are. Is sexy psychopath Machete Betty your festival hostess? Of course she is. Are tickets a reasonable $10 to $18? Of course they are.
The complete schedule follows:
5:30 p.m. - Doors open
6 p.m. - Slash (short)
An Evening With My Comatose Mother (short)
7 p.m. - Dead Stop (feature)
9 p.m. - Danny Caldwell Goes to Hell (short)
The Mummy and the Balloon (short)
Horror Movies Suck (short)
T is for Trash Can (short)
10:15 p.m. - The Killing Strain (feature)
5 p.m. - Doors open
5:30 p.m. - Nowhere Road (short)
Zombies and Assholes (short)
6:30 p.m. - The Hounds (feature)
8 p.m. - Machete Betty (special screening from the mistress of ceremony)
A Day in the Life (short)
10:30 p.m. - Dahmer vs. Gacy (feature)
EverybodyDiesFilmFest.com fills you in on all the knife-wielding, blood-splattering, brain-chomping fun. Because of the nature of the movies, you do have to be 18+ to attend. Question-and-slaughter sessions with filmmakers follow many screenings.
Here are some choice trailers for . . .
Incubator, based solely on the fact that Jimmy Weber's "horrifying" movie begins with the main character waking up in a bathtub full of ice--and later he gets that thing over his ribs:
Nowhere Road, based solely on Benjamin Dynice's horror/thriller having been shot over four days in Canyon Country--proving that something good might possibly come out of Canyon Country:
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Horror Movies Suck, based solely on the plot of John Mark Triplett's horror/comedy: a horror-movie geek turns his roommate onto a 1970s cult flick--and then watches the horrors on screen come to life. If I had a nickel for every time that happens: