Does anyone recognize "Chad" from his Alltel wireless' recent spate of lame serialized commercials? He plays this sort of blond self-important dickhead behind a kiosk in the mall. His rivals, a wimpy bag of nerds representing the other wireless carriers, are always conspiring to make him stop offering his superior Aryan "My circle" cellular plan, to which he pompously stares at them with his lake-blue eyes and ridicules their love of Dungeons and Dragons.
Well, you know what, "Chad"? You work at a wireless kiosk in the mall—enough said. Furthermore, nobody likes you. The only reason anyone pays attention to you is because you annoy the piss out of them. You're like the new "Dell Dude."
And for the actor who plays "Chad": Get ready for a lifetime of being known as the Alltel wireless guy, and only the Alltel wireless guy. You will never escape this career prison you've built for yourself by continuing to appear in these spots. Welcome to the world of pop-culture flash in the pan. You should have called it quits after maybe two of these ads at the most. Sure, the money is coming easy now, but you've sabotaged any potential acting roles for the future, except maybe to reprise the "Chad" role while being spoofed in some crappy Wayans Brothers or National Lampoon movie.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Good goin', dude.