Can a Gabacho Call Himself a Gabacho?
DEAR MEXICAN: Believe I heard from you, in an interview, that gringo is either outdated or inappropriate and that gabacho is the better choice. I've checked online, and most sources say gabacho is a pejorative and/or generally refers to Europeans. Is this the case, or is gabacho just a better word than gringo? Also, as a native SoCal cracker, is it acceptable for me to use gabacho or to refer to myself as such? What is the proper etiquette and usage so I don't offend anyone or embarrass myself? I've also asked friends, but the vote seems to be split.
DEAR GABACHO: As I've explained in this columna before, gabacho and gringo are synonyms for the same thing: gabachos, with a couple of key differences, including a certainty in their respective etymology. Gabacho comes from Provençal, while no one has ever put forth a definite origin story for gringo. And gabachos long ago appropriated gringo into a harmless term that has absolutely no sting, while gabacho maintains its picadura. And now you want to proudly refer to yourself as a gabacho, gabacho? No. Content yourself with the theft of half of Mexico back in the day, and leave our treasures alone once and for all.
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DEAR MEXICAN: I retired from the Los Angeles Police Department after 29 years, the last 24 years of which were spent in Narcotics Division Major Violators. Before retiring, I purchased a lot in Los Barriles. After retiring, I built a home there, and in 1997, I moved there and have been there full-time since. In 2005, I received my Mexican citizenship. On several occasions, both by U.S. Customs and regular citizens, I've been asked why I moved to Mexico. My response is always the same: I was a Los Angeles police officer for 29 years and in narcotics for 24 years. I've arrested a lot of illegal immigrants. Mexico is the only place I have ever been where all the illegals speak English. Saludos.
Ballin' In Baja
DEAR GABACHO: I see what you did there—stick to your day job 'cause you ain't the Keystone Kops. But you did bring up an interesting thought: the number of gaba illegals in Mexico. There are no hard números, given there are hundreds of thousands of old gabachos in Baja and Guanajuato, and I'm sure a big chunk haven't renewed their visas in years. The better indicator is the number of Americans that Mexico deports: The Mexican Secretariat of the Interior's Migration Policy Unit showed that for 2013, Mexico deported only 690 Americans, and I'm sure that count is primarily pochos. Compare that to the deportation figures for Central American countries: 32,800 from Honduras, around 30,000 for Guatemala, and only about 14,500 for El Salvador (and people say Mexis and Salvis have beef). See that, America? If Mexico can be kind to your undocumented in our country, why can't you do the same to our mojados?
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WATCH BORDERTOWN! Folks, the FOX cartoon on which I serve as an executive producer still has a shot at renewal, so por favor watch THIS SUNDAY at 7 p.m. PST, or stream it any time on Hulu or FOX Now. Gracias, and don't forget to tweet #renewbordertown!
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