Top 10 Songs About Stuffing Your Piehole

Thank (or blame) the FCC for becoming more lax, but musicians don't sing about food as often as they used to in the 80s and 90s. Pop artists replaced cherry pie with cherry chapstick and haven't looked back.

While euphemisms about food may no longer be necessary, even rarer are innocent songs about food. But we digest digress…

We all know Arlo Guthrie's “Alice's Restaurant” is the Thanksgiving song, but your Thanksgiving 2015 playlist should also include these kitschy songs about stuffing your piehole.

10. “I like Food” – Descendents

Chant this during your next dinner date.

I like food, food tastes good!
I like food, food tastes good!
Juicy burgers, greasy fries,
Turkey legs and raw fish eyes
Teenage girls, with ketchup too!

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9. “Don't Shit Where You Eat” – Ween

Great advice both literally and figuratively.

A little food and drink, ah-uh huh
Nothin' too fancy
Lamb, veal and some good ol' wine
This is the life for me
Don't shit where you eat my friend

8. “Martika's Kitchen” – Martika

Who doesn't love a risqué 80s song with a sexy bass line?!

Wooo, here we go The table's set baby
Wooo, ahh here we go
My oven is hot
Come on get some, in Martika's kitchen baby
You bring the noise and I'll bring the smile
It's been so long since you've been down in the kitchen baby

7. “Eggs N Sausage” – Tom Waits

Tom Waits would be the ultimate dinner guest.

Eggs and sausage and a side of toast
Coffee and a roll, hash browns over easy
Chili in a bowl with burgers and fries
What kind of pie?

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6. “Let Me Teach How to Eat” – Rev. Horton Heat

Perv-y song with an even perv-ier music video.

Let me teach you how to eat
Teach you how to eat
How to marinate the meat
Marinate the meat
Let me teach you how to eat
Teach you how to eat
It's a culinary treat
Culinary treat

5. “Girls Just Want To Have Lunch” – Weird Al Yankovic

And you thought we were going to post “Eat it.”

That's all they really want
Some lunch
Don't ask 'em to dinner or breakfast or brunch
'Cause girls, they want to have lunch
Oh, girls just want to have lunch

4. “TV Dinners” – ZZ Top

Classic use of claymation in a music video.

TV dinners they're goin' to my head
TV dinners my skin is turnin' red
Twenty year old turkey in a thirty year old tin
I can't wait until tomorrow…. and thaw one out again oh yeah!

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3. “Ham 'N' Eggs” – A Tribe Called Quest

It wasn't 'cool' to be a vegetarian in the 90s.

I'm plagued by vegetarians
No cats and dogs, I'm not a veterinarian
Strictly collard greens and a occasional steak
Goes on my plate
Asparagus tips look yummy, yummy, yummy
Candied yams inside my tummy

2. “Maximum Consumpion” – The Kinks

Lyric idea: a diner menu.

I'll have some clam chowder, followed by beef steak on rye
Pumpkin pie, whipped cream and coffee,
I wanna green salad on the side,
Don't forget the french fries,
Pizza pie, garlic and anchovie.

1. “Thanksgiving Song” – Adam Sandler

The ultimate turkey day song.

Turkey for the girls and
Turkey for the boys
My favorite kind of pants
Are corduroys
Gobble gobble goo and
Gobble gobble gickel
I wish turkey
Only cost a nickel
Oh, I love turkey on Thanksgiving

See also
10 Punk Albums to Listen to Before You Die
10 Goriest Album Covers
10 Most Satanic Metal Bands

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