On Oct. 18, I introduced two YouTube videos that are not only changing the face of music on the Internet as we know it, but are also re-shaping and re-defining the idea of swag. The songs ("Rifles Burs" and "Snacks") are so life altering, so hard ("Gunshots are the beat!") and so damn good that the artist doesn't even list his name on the videos. Thanks to a comment left on that post, we are led to believe that the emcee in question might or might not be named Gillionaire.
In that blog, I called "Rifles Burs" "the video/song of the year." It's true: the track leaves a sticky trail of swag all over listeners' ears just like how my hair used to leave a stain on the pillows of all the girls I was with when I rocked a greasy pompadour (which was pretty swag on my part). Without further ado: Q&A with the one-man Internet swagging machine...Gillionaire.
P.S. I decided to forgo all grammar rules and leave his answers intact. You see, this was an email interview (Gillionaire is too swag to speak to measly reports such as myself) and adding stupid things like periods and capital letters would totally remove all the swag. God knows the last thing I need is this dude showing up at my door because I changed his swag. I mean, if you listened to the song (and I know you did), you know that he carries a whole state on his back, so taking me out would be nothing.
OC Weekly (Ryan Ritchie): How does it feel to be the voice of our generation?
How does it feel? It feels like I've re-introduced violence to people of all ages and races. Feels great. Real talk, I was at the park, slam dunking like a gangsta and this broad brought her baby. Of course it was crying, so I looked at her real mean and shit. And I think she got the message, because instead of pulling out a pacifier, she pulled out an AK-47. Collapsible. Straight out of her purse. That baby shut the fuck up.
Kidding, what really happened was, I shot it.
What's the most swag thing you've done today?
The most swag thing I've done today. I tatted gwas across my chest that's swag in reverse... so hoes can see that shit in their rear view mirrors... like an ambulance. I'mma send you a picture. I got paper towel on it to stop the blood right now doe.
Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night to check a mirror just to make sure you've got swag?
What?! I don't ever have to check my swag. If I'm out of swag, I'm dead. It's the only thing that makes my heart beat. That's chemistry, nigga.
Who's a better rapper: You or House of Pain?
Fact is, House of Pain are my 5th cousin's on my mama's side. We ain't really competing since they older. I was only like 7 when "Jump Around" came out. Shooting my first rifle in a bounce house at this girl's birthday party. You probably heard about it on the news if you were alive then. Related note, that was the first time I made a hoe re-dead. Side note, if you're 7, with a rifle you can get away with murder, but you didn't hear that from me.
How many babies did you save from burning buildings during the Great Depression?
I haven't saved a baby from anything but a long life.
Now that Muammar Gaddafi is dead, how do you see the political climate of Libya impacting the United States' mission to spread democracy to the Middle East? Do you suppose his death will influence -- either positively or negatively -- the American economy?
I don't know what the fuck a Gaddafi is or what Libya tastes like, but if the fact that it's been killed supports my album, I'm swagging all over it.
On a related note, how would Bebop, Rocksteady and of course Shredder handle global terrorism?
Lemme tell you something about Bebop and Rocksteady. Back when G.I. Joes were shooting blue and red lasers, they were shooting bullet guns. Shell shocking all the haters. And you know, back to that economy question, lemme drop some smart knowledge on you. Where did Bebop and Rocksteady live? Technodrome. Where was the technodrome? Underground. What's underground? Oil, motherfucker! The Technodrome is always moving and you ain't seen them at the gas station once. They drilling into those tectonic plates and shit. Fuck you, I read books and know stuff.
What snacks should I eat before I make rifles burs?
Best snack for shooting people is sour gummy worms. Hands down. The worms allow you to empathize with the swagless assholes that you're making eat dirt. BURS, BURS, BURS, SWAG!
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If you can, please tell me why you are on parole?
I'mma plead the fif on the whole parole situation. Let's just say, I'mma wear gloves next time I commit a crime.
Take me through the entire process of making a ho re-dead.
How to make a hoe re-dead:
1. Make sure that hoe is dead. Worst surprise ever is when a hoe just jumps up and starts running... calling police and shit. It'll mess up your whole night.
3. Burs again
5. Hoe should've revived somewhere between steps 3 and 4.
7. Deny the fact that you've ever seen that hoe before at the trial.
Don't you hate when you're eating snacks and out of nowhere a bunch of flames appear?
Ain't nothing random about them flames. We were making s'mores on the other side of the camera.