"Five Songs That Will Put You in the Mood for Love" According to Maz Jobrani

This is a great song because it encourages people to go have sex in public.
This is a great song because it encourages people to go have sex in public.

Being a youngster in Iran gave comedian Maz Jobrani plenty of material to sharpen his craft for clowning and it definitely shows in his set. Not only does he showcase some stellar dance moves while gracing the stage, his act also talks up finding the humor in racial stereotypes, his family life then and now, the differences in way the world views politics, and owning his baldness. (Lucky for him, he pulls off the Mr. Clean flawlessly.) With everyone's favorite candy and flower-filled holiday falling during Maz's weekend at the Brea Improv (February 14th through 16th), Jobrani put together a list of"Five Songs That Will Put You in the Mood for Love."

5- Hall and Oates, "Private Eyes"

Maz Jobrani: Because even stalkers celebrate Valentine's Day. If there's a girl you've been secretly watching and you want to finally come out and let her know, this is the song for you. It's also got a catchy moment where you do a single clap followed by a double clap so you don't even have to worry about learning the words. Any stalker with rhythm can follow and enjoy this weird love song/stalker song/creepy song.

4- Journey, "Faithfully"

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I'm on the road a lot as a comedian so this one plays close to my heart. That said, you don't have to be on the road to appreciate it. Just go for a drive to pick up some milk for your loved one and play this song while you're gone. You will long for her, miss her, and want her. You will rush to the refrigerator at 7/11 and grab the milk. You will get back in the car and play it again, thinking of how hard you are going to hug her when you're back home. After all, you've been gone for at least 10 minutes. You will open the door, drop the milk and embrace her. She will push you off, weirded out at your over-emotionality. Then she will open the bag and tell you that you've gotten the wrong milk. Back on the road buddy!

 

3- Ylvis, "What Does the Fox Say"

This one is for anyone with kids. You can't just hog all the love songs for yourself and your wife on Valentine's Day. You need to play something that will get your kids jumping up and down for two hours so that come sleep time, they fall asleep fast and you and your lady can go into the master bedroom and get it on. This isn't a traditional love song as much as it's a strategic song designed to get those little rug rats exhausted. What does the fox say? It says, "Go to sleep little ones. Daddy's the fox now and mommy's gonna be barking soon!"

2- John Legend, PDA (We Just Don't Care)

First of all, this one makes the list so that people reading this don't think I'm a hundred years old. We need some youth in here. Secondly, this is a great song because it encourages people to go have sex in public. This is good for you, your lover, and all of us perverts who get to point at you and videotape you on our iPhones so we can post it on Facebook. It's a win/win/win. Go out, get it on, and let us know where you're going to be so we can be ready with our phones.

 

1- Commodores, "Still"

First of all, you have to see this video on YouTube for no other reason than to see Lionel Richie's fro. At first you are amused by how big it is and you want to make fun of him and the Commodores outfits, not to mention the weird dude modern dancing in the rafters. But as Lionel sings, he gets you and you start to tear up. It's the most touching song I've ever heard. You know it's beautiful when you start bawling at a Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf on Wilshire Blvd. "No, the coffee's not too hot Mr. Barista. It's Lionel and this damn song. Gets me every time. Now give me a refill! And yes, I do love you still!"

Maz Jobrani performs at the Brea Improv on February 14th-16th, 120 South Brea Blvd. 92821, (714) 482-0700. For tickets go to www.Improv.com. For more info, check out Maz's website www.MazJobrani.com and follow him on Twitter @MazJobrani.

See also: Steve-O Found a Way to Work Manginas Into His Stand-Up Comedy 10 Douchiest Guitarists of All Time 10 Douchiest Drummers of All Time

Follow us on Twitter @OCWeeklyMusic and like us on Facebook at Heard Mentality and follow the author on Twitter @AliNotAlli.


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