You were the lady carrying a red-polka-dotted baby into the bathroom at Nordstrom in South Coast Plaza on the Saturday before Mother’s Day.... More >>

Don’t Drinko and DrivoLook, cabrón: I’m all viva la raza and shit. But you’re a disgrace to all fat Mexican men. First... More >>

As we all know, times are tough. That’s why I walked into my local bank the other day to cash an old Series E government bond that I... More >>

You were the temporary judge who presided over my girlfriend’s speeding case. Apparently, driving 16 mph over the speed limit warrants a... More >>

You are the nice man who noticed the confused, elderly lady in the busy supermarket parking lot in South Orange County. You had been observing... More >>

You are the carpet-cleaning company that keeps sending prerecorded messages to my mobile phone and my landline. I got tired of being hung up on... More >>

I’m the 17-year-old who was, admittedly, messing with my little brother in an ice-cream shop. You’re the thirtysomething... More >>

You are the myopic driver who took out the left side of my car, which was parked in the UC Irvine Medical Center parking structure last Saturday.... More >>

I was the mountain biker who crashed into the weeds last weekend to avoid smashing into you on a blind corner. Granted, I was perhaps going a... More >>

I’m not a practicing Muslim, and I never pretended to be. You, on the other hand, used your religion as a pretense to oust me from your... More >>