Unfortunately and quite unintentionally, I released the gastric buildup created by my zesty chicken-stew lunch—extra Tapatio—at the... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulThis goes out to the jackasses in the unemployment office from a soon-to-be trash-bin dweller. It says on page 27 of your... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulMy wife had a sticker on the back window of her car that read, "Impeach Bush." We were shopping in Hollywood this past... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulAll right, assholes, listen up. Let me tell you two things you might not know. First off, not only did you scare the shit... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulWorking in a packed-with-cubicles office, and after an especially spicy lunch, one must carefully pick and choose places... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulThe smashed car window, I can fix. The stolen CD player, I can replace. The missing car key, I can fret about but deal... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulYeah, you: my idiot neighbor who called 911 reporting a lost child. This child was carrying a morning newspaper he likes... More >>

I thought you were different; you said you had changed/But what you really are is plain ol' deranged! You told me you loved me, then said, "I... More >>

Here's to you, and your demise. I used to hate you, and believe me, sometimes it's still hard not to, but I'm starting to see things differently... More >>

Illustration by Bob AulIt's not that I'm a misogynist, not at all. I embrace the very core of femininity. However, this anti-love note goes out... More >>