If you're not ready to sign a virtually unbreakable three-year contract with the nearest chain gym, which is probably an unsanitary sweat pool brimming with strippers and trolling dudes on 'roids, try going back to school. Enroll in a physical-education class at Orange Coast College, and you'll get access to one of the nicest, most recently remodeled gyms in the county. Also on-site are a full-sized track, swimming pool, and outdoor basketball and handball courts. There are rolling deadlines for enrollment on 16-, 12- and eight-week programs, all of which include open access to the facilities and admission to daytime workout classes. Plus, the people you'll be pumping iron with have more than endless staring into the mirror planned for the future. The best part is the cut-rate tuition at California community colleges, the lowest in the nation: The cost per credit hour is $20; another $29 in fees will get you through the semester.