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2013 Stories by ANONYMOUS

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  • Blinded By the Light

    published December 26, 2013

    You were the lady at the Alice Cooper concert at the Segerstrom Center for the Arts. You were in the front row of the top balcony, and you had... More >>

  • Bad Samaritan

    published December 19, 2013

    You were the insensitive, controlling idiot who misused the term "Good Samaritan" More >>

  • Kentucky-Fried Perv

    published December 12, 2013

    You know who you are, that paper-thin, whippet-like Charro Chicken delivery guy who puts bags of food (customers' orders!) on the ground and... More >>

  • The Horns On the Bus Go On and On

    published December 5, 2013

    You're the neighbor who unlawfully trespassed on my property and placed your letter of complaint in my mailbox—without the courage or... More >>

  • Family Movie From Hell

    published November 28, 2013

    You, sir, are the sole reason why kids today grow up to be disrespectful assholes. I was at the theater when you and your children sat next to... More >>

  • Lose My Number

    published November 21, 2013

    You are the telemarketers who have spoiled my great gig working from home with your nonstop calls on my land line, which I use for my job. Your... More >>

  • In-N-Out Rules

    published November 14, 2013

    You were the In-N-Out crew in Fullerton that was working on a recent Sunday afternoon. I placed my order, and when I got to the pay window, I... More >>

  • Find a Bed

    published November 7, 2013

    You were the idiot taking a nap in a parked car with the engine running next to a neighborhood park, and you actually had the nerve to be angry... More >>

  • Take a Hike

    published October 31, 2013

    You're the ass-hat who rode his moped up and down the Peters Canyon trail Monday evening. Your noise and dust storm made the evening's hike a... More >>

  • I'm Only Sleeping

    published October 24, 2013

    I was taking a much-needed nap in the front seat of my car, parked that warm afternoon with the engine and AC on in the shade of a tree on the... More >>

  • You Go, Joe

    published October 17, 2013

    You were the Regular Joe in line with the rest of us at the 7-Eleven on Dyer Road in Santa Ana. As a homeless man was shuffling past us all to... More >>

  • Hippie Alert

    published October 3, 2013

    You were obsessively polishing your precious car along the main drag of the Balboa Peninsula when I parked my small motorhome for five minutes... More >>

  • Parenting Fail

    published September 26, 2013

    You were the wackadoodle at the front door of Whole Foods who I usually avoid by entering near the restaurant. Now, I don't care what your... More >>

  • One More for the Road

    published September 19, 2013

    You were ejected Monday night from the tavern for inappropriate behavior. You were so drunk you couldn't even stand up. You then proceeded to... More >>

  • Yo, I'm Disabled

    published September 12, 2013

    You angrily swerved around us in your red Lexus and parked right in front of a business next to the Gold's Gym on 17th Street in Santa Ana. You... More >>

  • Doggy Drinking Decorum

    published September 5, 2013

    You were the sweet-looking lady who smiled at me while struggling to hold your bulldog over the drinking fountain so he could slobber all over... More >>

  • Mind the Line

    published August 29, 2013

    You're the douchebag, David Crosby-lookalike fisherman who was casting on Strand beach the other morning. You didn't bother to look in back of... More >>

  • You Dumb Puck

    published August 22, 2013

    You were the big knuckle-dragging oaf in line the other day at the Panda Express with an obvious distaste for children. I was a couple of... More >>

  • Fury On Four Wheels

    published August 15, 2013

    You're the fella in the motorized scooter/chair who came barreling into the foyer of my building without any regard for who might be in the... More >>

  • Balloon Thief

    published August 8, 2013

    You are the mother who stole my son's balloon. We were enjoying our carousel ride at South Coast Plaza, and my 11-month-old waved and laughed.... More >>

  • Ease Up, Hasselhoff

    published August 1, 2013

    You're the head Hasselhoff who has finally put in enough years to become the leader of the children's lifeguard summer camp that happens right... More >>

  • Here, Kitty!

    published July 25, 2013

    You are the neighbor, friend, boyfriend, fellow pet owner, homeless, rich, poor, out-of-towner, tourist, UPS worker, business owner, employee... More >>

  • Step Right This Way

    published July 18, 2013

    You are the lady by the OCTA station at night with the sunglasses on and the yoga mat rolled up under your arm. There are a ton of really... More >>

  • Christian Giving

    published July 11, 2013

    You are the good Christian who littered my OC Weekly with your pamphlet. Stop that. You took the time to go through every copy in the... More >>

  • Make Like a Tree

    published July 4, 2013

    We ended our relationship under the most sordid of circumstances. We should have left things buried and moved on. However, I made the colossal... More >>

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